Out of the slump.

I have been a bit down recently.
I didn't know the cause.
My girlfriends pampered and supported me,
guided me toward being good to myself.
Italian language began!
I love it.
Posting tiny vocabulary words through the house.
Finding it hard not to speak to others in the words I have learned,
who do not know I am learning another language.
And those I do speak Italian to,
I am trying to speak the English meaning as well.

My daughters have been a bit concerned with me as well.
Could be my 47th bday is approaching,
or the rainy, cold days.
I even went so far as to pop a xanex one evening.
I threw out the rest of the pills
because they expired in 2009.
But, I slept well in a good mood :)
When my daughters heard that my friends wanted me to be selfish for a bit,
they were concerned again.
I am who I am,
do what I do,
help where I can help,
love on who I can love on.
Learning Spanish so I could speak to the kids in my neighborhood
didn't seem like a bad idea to them.
I love them all for loving me so much.
I have actually decided to go in the middle.

When the idea of a women's retreat at church strangled my attention,
I gradually, in the wee hours of the morning,
realized that this is what my friends warned me of.
I put away the plans, and decided to move slowly.
They were very happy.....
that I learned the lesson,
and that I was very excited about something again.

In the end, I figured out what was wrong with this girl.

Last winter I was challenged to begin some spiritual transformation.
In my usual way, I dove right in.
My mornings were spent with the Lord.
My prayer life became a daily journal with concerns and answers for others.
(Something I have NEVER  been consistent in)
I began reading some awesome studies.
(See previous  2010 posts)

Over the past few months,
life has taken a turn.
Slowly, without even knowing it,
I have been slipping.
Appointments, early in the day.
Illnesses or responsibilities.
Not sleeping well then sleeping late.
The Today Show, then Dr. Oz.

Gradually all of these things robbed me of my time with God.
I wasn't journaling, praying consistently, or studying.
One day last week I realized this.
I have been trying to get back to my passion for time spent with Christ.
And I believe HE has welcomed me back with open, always waiting arms.

It is amazing how lost I felt.
It is even more amazing how quickly my mood has changed.
I notice sunsets and fathers playing with their children,
and smiling because of these.
He is placing people in my life again when I ask Him to.
I am blessed again.
He never moved an inch.
He was there every morning with a smile for me.
I passed Him by.

If I could only express how much joy and peace there is to be found in the Lord
for those who don't know, or those who have forgotten.
Things go more smoothly.
Appreciation is abundant.
There are still problems,
but they work themselves out with less tears and gnashing of teeth.
I know I will slide again.
It is human nature.
I only pray that I will remember this lesson earlier next time.

Blessed again!

Knitting Updates

With autumn sneaking around,
between hot, mosquito filled days,
icy cold frosty, rainy days,
sun filled, then cloud covered moments,
I am finding time to finish and start
a few knitting projects.
My initial longing was to spin and knit my dad
an icelandic cardigan I remembered from my youth.
It is the end of October,
and I am just spinning the icelandic.
There is NO way, I will spin and knit
quickly enough for a Christmas
or January birthday gift.
Winter is supposed to be long this year,
so I will plan on next Christmas, Daddy.

Instead, I finished a birthday gift for my BFF.
Yes, I had it knitted last year for her day,
but for some reason
I was terrified to sew it together.
It turned out beautiful,
if I do say so myself!
I'll give it to her Thursday.
The brown bottom edge was the very first thing I spun.
It is 100% alpaca.
A friend of mine spin the brown and white alpaca
from her herd.
Alpaca stretches and is VERY warm.
I'll try to get a pic of her wearing the sweater.
Happy Birthday K!

The second is the pair of socks
I have been working on for a bit.
I spun the Coopworth and enjoyed working with it.
When I came to the heel on this particular pair,
I hated how it turned out!
I ripped it back to the gusset...
which is difficult on size 1 needles.
I am hunting for another heel pattern now.
I don't believe,
in the tens of socks I have made,
that I have made two pairs using the same pattern.
SO many socks, so little time.
And most have been for my use!

I started knitting my grand baby a cardigan
I am using mostly my hand spun.
The hem and front seams are mixed wool,
the yellow stripe is marigold dyed mohair and silk,
the purple is a wool blend.
The fair isle pattern has some mohair,
angora and baby alpaca.
The white is store bought.
I didn't know what I was going to use,
as I didn't have enough of one yarn to knit a whole sweater.
So I just added as I went.
This is the first fair isle I have tried,
and was inspired by a book that comes out in November.
I may have time to get a mitten or two done
following these future patterns.

Happily enjoying completing.
Happily enjoying the changing leaves.
I am happily watching fuzzy catepillers.
Happily enjoying the nuthatches and titmice
gathering sunflower seeds and burying them.

I am happy and blessed.

Buongiorno!

I am learning Italian.

Before I take a class though,
I am studying from cds and books.
I like to know a bit before taking a class,
as languages were never my strong suit.
German I can spew off a few phrases
from middle and high school.
But I'm old now, and learning is difficult.

Mi familia is a bit upset with me.
I can greet and say good bye,
colors, numbers and a few phrases.
But when Hil is rushing out the door,
and I shout Arrivederci,
she rushes back in to see what I said.
I am starting to say the Italian, then English
as not to confuse or anger them.

I bought a "learning Italian in the car" set
with my first income from a baby cocoon I made,
and listened to it while cleaning the garage,
and driving to a from Saugatuck.
Admittedly, I missed a turn
while learning numbers and time.
I had to get back on the right road,
or wind up in Detroit.

So if I see you and it's morning,
I am saying good morning!
Evening, I am saying good evening.
If I am leaving I am saying good bye.

I am really very excited about this.
It's funny how similar to English and Spanish
this language is.
Nothing at all like German!

Saugatuck was beautiful,
although the leaves had not changes that much
to take my breath away.

I invested in some yummy teas and spices,
and started my Christmas shopping,
even though we are not giving gifts
to each other this year.
HARDY HARHAR!

Terry is traveling to Vancouver
and wants me to come with him....half heartedly.
Lots of work to take me with him in the truck.
Cleaning, insurance, hotels and eating better.
We would leave tomorrow (Wednesday) morning
and I have stuff to do.
No assurances I would be back
any sooner than two weeks either.

I worry about Chuck being alone most of all.
He doesn't eat when I'm gone,
and I do spend an awful lot of time with him;
even if I am only at the house or in the yard.

Silly to be so concerned for a dog.
One day I'll take him on the road with us.
For now, the girls are too busy,
and I don't want to ask my folks,
as Chuck likes his own home.
There is a new truck next spring too.
That is usually the time for travel on the 18 wheeler!

I am loving the fall.
Settling into spinning and knitting
some really cute baby things.

It's been unusually warm here in Indiana.
I am ready for the cool crisp!

I wish my phone could text in Italian.
Bummer.
Ciao!
I'll figure out blessed soon enough.

Moving onward

It's so good to have wonderful friends when you need someone!
To be able to call upon at any moment,
and know that they are there for you.
They are even ready to call out the troops if need be.
They give especially great hugs and wise words you need to hear.

I hope you have one or two of these in your life.

I was down for a bit.
Something came up and I felt alone.
My first response was to call on my girly girls.
They met me for salad,
I dumped all over them,
and they gave me firm wonderful advise.

I do too much for everyone else, and not anything for myself.
I, on the other hand ,
feel like I have way too much free,
lazy uninvolved selfish time.
I enjoy fiberarts and lounging in my back yard.

But I get what they are saying.
Too much of my mental time,
is taken up by concerns for others.

I am only responsible for myself and what I choose to do.
Not the consequences others will suffer.
I can't change any of their stuff to make life easier for them.

So, with the firm suggestions of my wise friends,
I am exploring my options.
Not to include cooking classes, so I can make better Care meals,
not to take Spanish, so I can communicate with
my neighbors I encounter while walking Chuck,
not volunteering at the Milton home,
where Mema spends two days a week.

I joined weight watchers and am committed to eating healthy,
as I usually don't get enough calories during the day...
thus my body thinks it's starving and holds on to every morsel.
I am committed to exercising everyday, more than just walking Chuck.
Here comes the total gym from the closet.
When Hil moves out, I will have a room dedicated to this clunky thing.
Until then it will be in the dining room!

And, I am researching taking some classes for me.
I have always been interested in Art History.
I also would like to learn Italian.
Not much good to anyone but me when I travel to study art.
But that is the point, right?

I am anxious to spin the icelandic I carded last weekend.
I have a wonderful sweater planned for my dad.
When I was a girl, he had a cardigan from Mexico.
My sister and I loved that sweater.
When we were a bit older and in school,
while living in Pittsburgh,
in the fall and winter,
it was the only warm item that was comforting.
I think my sister ended up with that sweater.
But I would like to make daddy one like it.
So many nice memories from my childhood seem to
revolve around that sweater.

Flu shot and mortgage payment, laundry
and lunch with a friend.
I hope I am good company.
I still feel a bit edgy and unfriendly.
Bible study tonight that I am looking forward to.
That has not changed.
I love my church.

And I have talked with God about not wanting to be
distracted from His plans for me.
In fact that is my primary goal to discover.
I know that He wants the best for me,
and sometimes that means taking the time for me.

Thank you for your prayers.
I am blessed!