Time is a River by Mary Alice Monroe

Today is a good day to read.
New Year's Eve and my honey is in Canada.
Never do have many big plans on this holiday.
We try to stay awake until midnight,
Bang some pots and pans
out the front door into the New Year,
and shake some money for luck.
Must have black eyed peas and pork for dinner the next day.
I'll check the refrigerator.

However, back to reading.
I found this book at the library a few weeks ago.
Just cracked the cover
to make sure I was interested,
then life got very busy.
Today, while it is raining,
I settled in to read.

I picked it up because the main character
is recovering from breast cancer.
A topic I am just now familiar with.
There still lies a tiny trickle of fear in the back of my mind.

Have you ever been so taken and pulled into a story
that you didn't want to stop reading?
The story line is one that you can see yourself fall into
quite completely and so very easily?

I am only through the first third of the book,
but it has me captured heart and soul.
V and I are going out to dinner,
so I must hold my suspense for an hour or two.
Thankfully it will be Saturday tomorrow.
If my eyes will allow me,
I would very much like to finish this book by
the first day of the new year.

I am really hoping that this book does not
disappoint me in the revealing of it's mysteries.

And Spring pokes it's little head out for a day!

What a strange and wonderful day today turned out to be!
Temps in the fifties and rainy.
Reminds me so of Seattle!
I've cleaned and organized the dining room
and spare bedroom...now workout room.

I sat in the parking lot of Kroger's for half an hour today.
Listening to the rain and thunder,
I was wishing I could be in a huge, heated bubble.
With the rain pelting down all around me.
It's lovely seeing the grass and plants again.

However, there is a lively little woodpecker
pecking around in my gutter above my family room.
Does he not realize this disturbs the peace in my home?
I suppose I need to get more suet out for him.
The darn grackles have been hoarding out there again tho.
Safflower seed coming!

I am so looking forward to a new year.
I was asked a question today:
What is God calling you to do with Him?
Honestly, I don't know right now.
I seem to be in a protective, self healing,
separate kind of mood these days.
I am also doubting these previous feeling and
that maybe there is something God wants from me,
but Satan is using my selfishness to block His efforts.
Will be praying and seeking out His plans.
Maybe I do need to heal and focus on me a bit.
Just a bit.
I read that when the Holy Spirit strikes,
it is best to act right away, because the longer you wait,
the more selfishness takes over.

There are thank you letters I need to write to folks
for their support when Mom B passed away.
There are babies growing and about to be born.
So I must prepare some rotations for their mommies' meals.
The family room needs to be finished.
And I have lots of wool to spin!

There is a vintage and handmade arts show
April 10 at the Elks Lodge.
I think I would really like to make up a bunch of yarn
and try to sell it.
But pricing......? UGH.

There are things that need to be said,
but I am so afraid to say them.
I am not sure how to say these things
so that my words will be heard in the manner
that they are ment.

Heb 10:38 says that My righteous one will live by faith.
And if he shrinks back,
I will not be pleased with him.

I am faced now with pressing forward
or drawing back.

I know how much I have to lose,
but I see how much I have to gain,
and that is what I want to focus on!

I am blessed.
If not with words,
then with faith that the right words will come
when they need to.
If they need to.

ellen

Well, that was fun.
If you read the previous post,
you knew I was in a down diddy down do down mood.
I decided to untangle the xmas lights.
Yup, took the tree apart first,
then tried to untangle the lights.
Good project for a diddy day.
After that was completed,
and a full cup of coffee spilled,
I took scotch tape,wrapped it around my hand,
and began gathering all of the artificial tree leaves.
Finally gave up and got out the vacuum.
Much better.
I walked into the family room where Chuck
was watching the ellen degenerous show.
Now, I don't usually sit and watch shows in the afternoon.
But...Ellen is always a smile bringer.
The photos are of two kids in her school photo hair spot.
The brunette she said looked like
someone had put Harry Potter in the dryer!
HAHAHAHAHA.

Anyway...feeling much better now.
Off to get the grey colored!
I am blessed
even when I am down!

end of year, winter blahs

I don't know if it is the shorter days,
the rainy weather approaching,
or this nasty cold I cannot seem to shake,
but I have no motivation, energy or get up and go.

My folks are moving tomorrow.
Their bickering is keeping me away.
I am praying that all three of them
will go to their own quarters
and live happily ever after.

I don't understand the glasses people are wearing.
You know the ones.
The rose colored ones that hide all of the reality.
Why can't people see what is so clear to every one else?
Embarrassment, ego, pride?
These things will only keep you miserable for years to come.

Maybe I need to get my kickin boots out.
Keep my tongue tied up, but swing away?
I am reminded of the Mel Gibson movie Signs.
Where the brother took his bat off of the wall
and swung away at all the glasses of water.
Kinda what I feel like doing!

I have been spinning alot recently.
I have finished up some wonderful walnut dyed
tencel and mixed with silk/mohair roving.
Very pretty.
Three skeins about 500 yards.
I also spun some romney mix with turquois silk noil.
I am knitting it into a cowl for V.
I will be busy this winter
with everything I have stashed away
just for the purpose of spinning during the blahs.
What better excuse than having nothing to spin in the spring
when all the critters are sheared again!

It seems as though, since coming home from Alabama,
I have not wanted to be social at all.
I hope I get out of this mood.

Maybe it was the memories that flooded back from family times past.
There really were alot of great memories from Alabama.
My sister in law and I used to talk until the sun rose.
All the kiddos asleep hours before.
I wish I could have those moments again.
I'm afraid, with my mother in law gone,
Taryn has said goodbye to the world.
I never did understand why she hated me so.
Sad.
The photo at the top is of Taryn and her son Ben.
After the funeral,
Taryn got her kids together for some pickin.
Thus all of the memories.
Let the Circle brought her to tears.
I hope she will finally be happy.
Someday maybe....

My grey hair roots are glowing through.
Coloring them tonight.
I missed Christmas service so much.
I did finally see lights with Hilary.
She is so much fun!
And Ritters ice cream in the car in negative temps was awesome.

I did get a new phone.
Smart, so they say, but I feel very stupid.
Hil taught me to text with swype.
It is sooooo cool!
For any of you that received texts from me before smart,
I must apologize.
This is a new year!
Come on 2011!~

Be careful what you pray for...

...for you shall surely get it!
IN SPADES!

I must admit that I was pretty stressed out
by going to Alabama for my mother in law's funeral.
It really surprised me
that she was as sick as she was.
When my father in law died eight years ago,
she was ready to follow him then.
Even though Mom was only 77 years old,
there really was nothing wrong with her.
She wanted to be done with this earthly existence.

I've said before that I don't have the best relationship
with the "other side".
I asked everyone for prayers to keep everything peaceful,
no arguments, no inappropriate comments, no hateful looks.
And to keep my tongue in it's place.

Well, before I left, I had a sore throat.
By the time we got to Alabama,
twelve hours later,
I had laryngitis.
The whole time we were there.
Oh, I tried to talk, and whispered loudly,
and am going to the doctor today after returning home.
I never felt badly.
Just couldn't talk.

Funny how God answers prayers.
REALLY FUNNY!
HA HA
I know that His way is always the best answer.
I, myself, would never have thought of laryngitis!
Okie mc smokey, skiddley doo!

As it turned out, it was a small funeral.
Lots of Terry's cousins and old friends were there.
Let's be honest....every one there was a cousin! LOL

The girls had a blast with their brother Andrew.
Terry and I so enjoyed listening to them laughing and being happy.
I believe that's one of the things God intends
when He takes one of His own back to Him.
That family gets together to share funny and sad memories.
I wish that the WHOLE family could have shared like that.
They are funny about anyone but BLOOD relatives.
I was grateful for the time that was given to my family though.

I was able to spend a good bit of time with two very dear friends.
They are so welcoming!
There is something special about the Southern people!

Both my girls were amazing! Beautiful.
Classy and so grown up.
We lived there twelve years ago
and it has been eight years since the girls have been back.
No one there seems to have changed.
They all loved seeing the girls.
And seeing how they have grown into women.
I knew they would.
Going home.
Nice.

Back to reality after a whirlwind trip full of emotion.
My girls drove all 1500 miles but for an hour.
They are such troopers.
I am so proud of them.
That prayer was answered too.

I am proud of Terry that he is such a wonderful father
and husband and brother and son and friend.
He works so hard for us all.
Thanks honey.

Yes, Charlie survived.
I was worried for a bit, but he greeted me as normal
and is sleeping now on the couch.

I loved seeing all the nephews and nieces,
even if we didn't have much to say to one another.
The great nephew is a true blessing.
I am off to hunt for the other three Kinex to complete his set.
The grandbabies' gifts are with their daddy
on the way back to Texas.
No post office drama or expence for us!

And Terry will be on his way to Canada Friday.
At least we got to spend two wonderful days as a whole family.
We are blessed.
Thanks God for your choices and answers to our prayers.
And thank you friends for your prayers.

Road Trip!

Not really looking forward to this one.
I am excited to spend hours and hours with my girls.
Trapped in a car for 30+ hours there and back!
I am excited to see my honey soon.
I am excited to see Terry's son Andrew,
and there will be no postage to mail the grandbabies
their presents....bonus!
I am looking forward to seeing and hugging old friends.
Looking forward to hugging on family I haven't seen in ages.
And the southern food.....need I say more?!

The rest....well...one of life's to do's.

And the snow is coming.
We are leaving tonight so we can have some time
to relax before having to get on the road again.
I am praying there is a decent hotel in Reform.
One of two they have, we stayed at in June.
Won't be staying there again.
This is only the fifth funeral I have been to, I think.

Please pray for strength and understanding
and no feuds please.
I am blessed.

Atta way God!

Psalm 17:7-9

Skipped a few days study, while being sick.
When I opened the books this morning,
this is what I read.

Show Your marvelous lovingkindness by Your right hand,
O You who save those who trust in You
From those who rise up against them.
Keep me as the apple of Your eye;
Hide me under the shadow of You wings.
From my deadly enemies who surround me.

Now, for those of you who do not know,
I am not well liked by my in laws.
I know, I know.
I can imagine that I will not be welcomed
at my mother in law's funeral.
I will go because my husband wants me by his side.

Prayers will be greatly appreciated that
I will keep my mouth shut,
look for God's opportunities,
if there are any,
and support my husband.
This is not about me.
Help me to remember that.
Let me find the cool shadow to run under
so that they must get through Him to get to me.
Let me follow only His word and path that He wants me on.
I know I am blessed beyond what I deserve.

Of Course.

I am always saying that I can handle things
better when I am stressed.
At least, that seems to be the time I am needed most.
And it really does seem when I am at my best.

So....
My dad was found to have two blood clots in his legs.
Has to be OFF his feet for five days and
take two shots a day until the blood thinner kicks in.
Not easy being still for this fella.
He loves to snow blow and work around my house.
Not to mention that he, my mom and grandma are moving
to Walnut grove Dec 30.
Luckily they are almost packed up.
And I always said that I would NOT move them again...
God has other plans. LOL

I have gotten sick somehow.
I am praying it isn't strep throat.
Did alot of stuff the last weeks and I have felt it coming on.
No good deed goes unpunished!

This morning, Terry called to let me know that his Mama died.
It was a blessing,
She was suffering in the end.

And.......
I must get well.
V will try to get off work,
and Hil is trying to reschedule clients for tomorrow and Thurs eve.
If all works out, we will leave Tuesday early,
viewing is Wed at 10:00, funeral at 11:00.
We will eat and leave Wednesday evening.

If the girls can't get off,
I will hopefully pick up my sister in Indy,
On the way back, we will pick up her kids
to celebrate Christmas here,
and she can help me move our folks!

Now as we all know,
God has His own ideas,
so I am trying very hard to be flexible
and take in consideration His plans.

It has already worked that Terry'[s son will pick him up in
San Antonio, and they will travel together.
The weather is warm, if a bit rainy in the south.

So, just have to get rid of this red nose and throat!
I am blessed!

Inspiring

It doesn't take much.
A word or two, or a nod.
These days, seeing someone else comment on a blog you follow.
We all have our ups and downs.
We aren't alone.
We need to remember that we are not alone,
and that others get down too.
Take comfort in others' advice.
From their encouragement.
They give it with their whole hearts.

It is really easy to read, or pass by without noticing.
Or worse yet, noticing and not stop.

I learned a valuable lesson the other day.
I read a new twist on the Good Samaritan story
in my study by Beth Moore.

Yes, the priest and the Levite passed by and the Samaritan stopped and helped.
We all know this, or have heard it.
We also learn that Samaritans were considered mongrels, half breeds.
A good Samaritan was considered an oxymoron to Jews.

In Luke 10:25-37
when Jesus told the story to the lawyer who asked
what he could do to inherit eternal life,
the lawyer would have been very familiar with the players.
I was not.

The priest and the Levite were coming from Jerusalem to Jericho.
They were on their way home from the most important
life work they would ever do.
They had been performing their brief tenure of service in the temple.

Don't you think that they would have been at their most humble,
most grateful, most willing to help moment at that time?

Sometimes good is at it's best when the law of the heart
eclipses the law of the land.
Our neighbor is the person who has a need.
He is a broken one.

Thank you friends for being neighbors to me and mine.
Even your small words of encouragement
are bright rays of needed sunshine in our lives!

I am blessed.

Chipper

Yes.
I was called chipper tonight.
Like it is a bad thing!
Yes.
I annoy my children and family lots of times,
with my chipperness.
Tonight I actually annoyed my pastor.
But, I had an amazing time tonight
handing out cocoa and cookies
under a tarp while it was raining!

I met some really cool people,
who were excited to be helping...even in the rain.
There were great conversations going on...
around the fires, and in the stable
with Mary Joseph and Santa!
The kids were loving it!
And yes, the weather was an easy topic to break the ice.
Sarah was eager to please and even wore a coat tonight.
What a trooper!
Ed was the biggest help and carried the Styrofoam cups for me
while I lugged 10 gallons of cocoa out in a red wagon!
Thanks Ed.
Yes, I will teach Melissa to make you a sweater!

I suppose this is why I love nights and activities like tonight.
People make connections,
It shows the neighbors that we will be there for them
even in the not so perfect situations.
We are stepping up to the plate and ready to swing!

Yes.
Way too chipper.
Way too happy tonight.
My apologies.

Nah. Suck it up!
It was a great night!

Jennae...great job!
I am blessed!
Abundantly!

Off with a BANG!

Jumped on the total gym while the cookies were baking...
signed Christmas cards,
taking Mema to the salon for her weekly pampering with Hilary.

Read in study this morning about Martha and Mary.
I must admit that I am Martha.
I also have the heart of Mary.
Study said that it was Martha's invite to Jesus to come to her home.
Not the head of the house, Lazarus.
Not Mary, the depth of the house.
It was the hands of the house.
And she prepared everything and Jesus was comfortable,
and able to teach those around who were also invited.

I have learned that I can be prepared....
and then stop and listen attentively.
It's all in the preparedness.

Now, I do rush around madly for days ahead of time.
But I try to start each morning with study, and quiet.
Before facebook. or emails, or breakfast.

I learned this from a dear friend.
When you come out of bed in the morning,
imagine Jesus sitting at the table wishing you a good morning.
It is up to you to ignore Him, and hustle about your day
or share your first moments with Him.
He will be there patiently waiting
no matter what you choose.

Thanks Kimberly!
I am blessed,
because I choose to receive all the love
that Christ lavishly has for me!

yummy rich colors!

Making some cookies for church today.
I had trouble with the peanut butter kiss cookies.
I am allergic to peanut butter.
So neither I, nor my children have had these staple cookie
most of you take for granted.
I don't know why I chose to make them.
I think I found a good recipe online.
However after cooking the recommended 10 minutes,
they looked raw to me.
I cooked them another 7 minutes before removing them from the oven.
I stuck the little kisses into each center
and waited for them to cool.
What I was waiting for, I don't know.
Not like I could taste them.
No offers from facebook proved worthwhile in sampling.
Hope they are good.

One of my dreams...ah...death bed wish...
is to try a Reece's peanut butter cup.
Or a big spoonful of extra creamy peanut butter.
It smells and looks wonderful!
Sunflower and soy butter are ok...but just don't quite come close,
or so I am told.

Some slice n bake and some candy cane cookies, round out my baking.

I dyed some Icelandic yesterday and it turned out so luscious!
Brightened my spirits right away.
I'm going to try some drum carding and spinning this weekend.
I bought the new copy of Spin In Magazine today and plan on
making a nice cuppa tea and devouring every word.

Can you tell I'm on a diet this week?
Everything seems to revolve around comforting foody words.
I am blessed.

Hrumph! With a happy ending!

Why is it that folks fall for the lies of others?
When they know better.
They know the history.
Yes, people can change,
but what if they don't?
At least not yet.

And how can someone hold onto a grudge
over something that never even happened?
For decades!!

So this snowy day, I am waiting.
Waiting for an update since Terry is in Reform.
Funny how he forgets I'm on pins and needles when he is there.
My mind goes to conspiracy,
but the truth is,
the phone signals are horrible,
and he is checking out the situation.
SO I will wait.

I snow blew yesterday and scraped the roof.
It needed it again later in the afternoon,
but I waited until this morning.
The birds were fed their peanuts and seed first thing.
A path was shoveled for Charlie,
and I was quite bundled up.

As I was pulling snow off of the roof,
in great muffled thuddy splats,
Daddy used the snow blower.
I love that 72 year old man!
He just goes and goes and goes.
He did the neighbors' drives and walk too.
All he wanted for reward, was a brownie.
I threw them away last night.
I started a new diet.
Poor Daddy.

All the Cards are made and ready to be signed and delivered.
I may only mail a few because I tried something
a bit different this year.
Hopefully, if yours is mailed, it doesn't leak!
Didn't even think about the post office's reaction.
HMMMM
May need to be creative.

So, I will card and maybe dye some wool in bright hues.
I received 3 pounds of white Icelandic wool
and it is calling for color!
This seems like a nice day for carding!
Tomorrow I will spin and card some more!

See, I feel better already!
Thanks for putting up with a little self absorption today.
I may actually try to tackle I tunes again.
Wish I knew music!
I am blessed

What the heck, God?

I must admit that I am quite the planner.
When something needs to be done,
I get down to it.
I don't like to take breaks, or chat, or fool around.
When it is done, then I have fun.

So when the news was that Terry's mom was dying,
and Terry wanted me to come with him via the truck,
I went into mode.

I shopped for appropriate pants and shoes....
a feat I really hate to do!
Big butt and tummy and funky feet do not make shopping easy!

I enlisted the girls to help with the dog, and Mema's packing,
I reassigned my duties at church to V,
Delivered meals ahead of time, as well as hats and mittens.

Was going to miss out on the holiday festivities at church,
but did what I could do...
sure wish I could have made more hats than 5 tho!

I did laundry and packed for winter weather and Alabama weather
and even Texas weather.

It was like a ballet!
I only had to get knitting together and Xmas card lists.

Now I am also a big believer in God's plans.
And to accomplish His plans
He will pull some really wacky stuff outta the bag.

So, Terry was in St Cloud MN waiting on a trailer.
Imagine...a huge company not having a single trailer available!
At 5pm, Terry got his trailer out of the shop.
Not an ordinary trailer mind you.
This was a perfectly fine trailer,
just in the shop for a regular check up.
Now, if the trailer had been available at 9 in the morning,
when Terry was ready for it,
he would have driven the 150 miles north to pick up his load,
swung by to get me and I would be on my way south.

No.

Instead he had to leave out in the beginning of a horrible snowstorm.
A snowstorm, by the way that blocks him from coming to get me.
He has sunny, but cold skies all the way down to Houston.
God has His hand in this mess.

When I heard that the first thing my sister in law asked my husband was...
Why is Kris coming?
I knew that the trip could possible get ugly.
I was loaded for bear tho... Jesus in front of me in full armor.

However, God may have something else in store for me.
Maybe I'm not as strong as I think I am.
I know that Terry is stronger than me and can handle his family.
I just pray he doesn't have to.
If I am not there, maybe things won't get ugly.
They won't have a chance to fling things.

The plan now is that when Mom passes, Hilary and I,
and possibly V will drive down for the funeral and drive home.

If God has something else planned, I am all packed.
I got all my frustrations out in my sleep last night
and have accepted God's will and timing.
Just know that I am ready to jump when He says jump.

This Christmas monster is not going to get me!
I am going to help out at church as much as I can
and enjoy every moment of it!
I am blessed.

Following Through

The tree is up, decorated and so pretty at night.
I like to take my glasses off and look at the lights.
If you don't wear glasses, squint at the tree.
It makes the lights look star-bursty!

Many things are happening at church that I have volunteered for.
Decorating the church, neighborhood luminary walk,
book sale, hat and mittens for the elementary schools,
meals for CARE ministry,
lots of knitting to do for the holidays,
watching the snow and staying cuddled in the house enjoying the season.

But no.

My mother in law is dying.
My husband is picking me up and we are driving to Alabama.
I don't know how long I will be gone.

I was a little upset about this.
For more reasons than one.
I love being home.
I love my family and church.
I love my...comfort.
Yes, I was pouting and stamping my feet.
Feeling sorry for myself.
All my plans and comforts were being turned about.

BUT....

I have also been studying Jesus.
Luke 9:23 says
He said to them all, "If anyone wants to come with Me,
he must deny himself, take up his cross daily,
and follow Me."

Also Luke 9:28-36
Christ reserves the right to bring us to a place that forces us
to ask "who is this man?"
And if we are willing, He will show us a glimpse of His glory
and we will be changed as He transforms before us.

I have gotten used to seeing God as I always have.

Then I read Mark 7:31-36
Jesus took a deaf man aside, away from the crowd.
In my study, Beth Moore encourages that
sometimes, when Jesus is about to do something really special in our lives
He will rearrange our surroundings.
He will take us out of our element,
to give us a new perspective on God's glory and power.
To grow in us a spiritual gift of love for the body of Christ.

Finally I read Mark 9:14-18
The disciples were unable to drive out demons,
even though God had given them the power to do just that.

Beth's reasons for this were...
Their positive influences (Jesus) were absent.

We must know where our confidence is coming from.
In our own faith, and not from those close to us.
To stand, with Christ, on our own two feet.

And the second reason, is that the disciples strongest negative influences
were present in the teachers around them.

We can't afford to wait until everything around us
is perfect for us to show the love of God to those who need to see it.
God teaches us that sometimes,
the worst conditions
can often provide the best atmosphere to act in faith.
If our faith discouragers
can shake our confidence badly enough to disable us,
our confidence may be in ourselves instead of God.

So I will joyfully travel to Alabama because I love my husband.
I love that he wants me next to him as he struggles with this painful time.
I know that I am not welcome by some family there,
as I am loved here in my hometown.
I know that God is with me and I am to show His love
even when I am uncomfortable.
I am His to use in any way He wants to use me.
And I am at peace with this....now.

In a way, I am taking off my glasses to look at the lights.
Looking through the star bursts in a new way.
I am blessed.

Rolling in...

The smell of freshly brewed coffee got me sucked in to a bit of thinking.
The weather yesterday was windy, but pleasant.
Daddy and I got the rest of the lights on the house.
I think I need one more bush net.
I also must venture into the attic for tree decorations.
The mouse count is Kris-7 Mice-1 now.

It is damp and they say it may snow tonight.

Chuck got his hair cut so it is a bit cold to walk him.
Must knit a warmer sweater for him.

Was thinking about my mother in law today.
She is getting a hospice evaluation...I think.
She is dehydrated and confused.
Not very reliable info coming from Alabama.

As I think back on my time with Rebecca,
I smile.
These past few years I have not spoken to her,
or any of the family there in Alabama.
Just makes life a bit less stressful.

However, when I lived there in the early days,
Mom and I had loads of fun.
She was always there to take my young girls when I needed her to.
I was in the hospital for pneumonia once and she came in the wee hours,
watched the girls until I got home three days later,
then stayed with me for a few days.
She made me chopped steak with potatoes and onions in a frying pan.
To this day, I cannot make this.
Her cooking was always delicious...in that southern way.
Gravies, and breaded and fried and sweet and sticky!

We always had a fun time going out to eat.
Chinese or southern with fried pickles.
The best treat tho was when we went to the buffet...Quincey's I think...
Best rolls ever!

Walking around the property was calm,
as was sitting and talking on the front porch.
We had lots in common then...both our men were ironworkers
working in New York.
She introduced bubble wrap popping to the girls and I.

One year, Mom broke her arm and Ronni and I went to tend her for a few weeks.
Ronni was only three months old.
I remember waking in the middle of the night seeing Mom leaning over her crib.
She loves her grandbabies.
One of her favorite things to do was come get us for a dairy queen!

Fellowship Baptist church also holds many dear memories.
All of them with Mom.
The Dinners on the Grounds times were of course my favorite times.
Such wonderful, simple, country folk.

Although Mom is bipolar, and there have been MANY bad moments because of this,
sometimes during her high times,
we would laugh and joke and carry on late into the evenings.
Oh the stories she told of all the skeletons of our little town!
All the history, and early days of her marriage.
Enjoying fires it the fireplace or in the yard.

I even repainted her tub when they first moved in.....
we went shopping for her dining room table set,
and one Christmas I was even awarded the red "You are someone Special" plate.

I am sad, that relationships, and people change.
I am sad that for the most part, I was not accepted into the family.
I am sad that my girls will not remember the fun times, but only the bad.

I will finish getting ready for Christmas, and listen to happy music,
think of the fond times with Mom and pray for her quick recovery.
I know she doesn't want to live in this world any longer,
and pray that what time she has is happy and peaceful.
I pray she is well taken care of.
I wish I could take care of her in a way that would show her
how much I treasure our relationship.

New Traditions

As Thanksgiving rises on this foggy, icy morning,
I am struck with new traditions in my family.

With the addition of boyfriends for the girls and our circle,
I have had to make some adjustments.
I must admit that last year, the first change,
was quite difficult for me.
Patting myself on the back for how well I am doing this year!

Hilary is spending today with Joe's family.
Veronica is cooking and Jamie is playing video games, so I'm told.
My mom, dad and grandmother and I are going out to Cracker Barrel today
for our meal and to celebrate my mom's 72nd birthday...last Monday.

My sister and her family were to come tomorrow, but they are having car troubles.
Hopefully they can come Christmas morning.

I will work on lighting the xmas tree, and preparing green bean casserole,
stuffing preparations, apricot brie topping, and some strawberry rolls.

Tomorrow is black Friday, which I have never participated in,
but for one year working at Media Play
(the best job I have ever had)
I will make orange monkey bread, Brussels sprout au gratin,
and finish the stuffing.
At midnight I will start the turkey...new recipe off of SweetPaul.com

Then on Saturday morning my family will gather for cooking,
and breakfast and games and eating!

It sounds like a nice relaxing series of events.
I used to cook everything myself in one day
and was exhausted and sick for Christmas.
V is bringing desserts and sangria, and chive rolls,
Hilary is bringing sweet potato casserole
and Mom and Mema are bringing relish trays,
deviled eggs and cranberry jelly.

We have also decided to do something different this Christmas.
I don't have small people around any longer to buy for.
My daughters have their own jobs and money
and buy what they want and need when they want or need it.
I do the same thing.
However, I will be spoiling my grandbabies ridiculously!

So we are doing a dirty bingo/white elephant this year.
Everyone was to bring enough gifts for each member of the family.
All gifts must be thoughtfully chosen or found.
Only one gift could cost $10 and that was to be the most expensive gift.
The creativity and excitement come in the wrapping!

We each take a card and go around the circle picking a gift.
The next person can take from the pile or take from someone else.
Until all presents are taken.
Then unwrap!
Possibly exchange.

As my father was thinking this through,
he realized that with 12 people here for Christmas morning,
(Hil will be with Joe's family Christmas eve)
we would have a pile of about 132 gifts!
We would be gifting until New Years.
We have decided on 5 gifts.

Terry and I always go out and do a few stocking stuffers together.
Hopefully I can reign him in on overdoing again!

I am excited about these new traditions.
I am excited about the new traditions to come in the following years.
I love the holidays.
I am blessed.

Dry...Dead...

Beautiful!

Stumbling around my house this morning,
I noticed all of my dried flower arrangements.
All these flowers are from my garden,
some from more than 3 years ago.
I am amazed how beautiful they remain.
I am blessed.

Red Sky

I grew up with the saying
Red sky at night, sailors' delight
Red sky in the morning, sailors take warning.

My family are not sailors.
As far as I know the only ones to even be on a ship,
were my great aunts and my father's mother,
when they took a cruise to Hawaii.

However, I constantly take notice of the sky.
I am a wanna be weather girl.
I have a friend who used to live in Wyoming.
She has different saying for the weather watch.
Something like....if the deer are feeding, it means snow.

This morning, as I was sitting at my dining room table,
I glanced up and saw the beautiful shocking pink and blue sky.
I had to run for my camera.
Wow! Was it nippy outside as I stole a few pictures.
It never is as beautiful in a photo, at least my photo,
as it is seeing the view with my own eyes.

As I was studying the fish and loaves story, I was reminded of a few things.
I need to think in "faith" mode more often than I do.
I need to be more open to what Christ can do through me.
It is never what I can do.
I am such a pitiful slug when I am close to Him.
I am so lucky that He loves me so, and gives me opportunities to
let Him shine through my little attempts
that become HUGE when He is involved!

I need to think BIGGER!

Christ can perform astounding things when I bring Him all I have.

When I bring Him EVERYTHING,
He multiplies it beyond my wildest imagination.
But if I only surrender some of my lot,
it can dwindle to virtually nothing.

It is sad how often I only allow part of what I have to be used.

I need to remember to give it ALL to Him, all the time!

Thanks for the beautiful sunrise this morning God.
And thank you for the comforts
to get through whatever wintry weather is coming.

Lots of hat knitting to be done this weekend I feel.
I am blessed

Grey

Today is a grey kind of day.
Not emotionally.
I am in a super relaxed, thankful mood today.
Not really inspired to put up holiday lights tho.
That means getting into the attic to hunt for boxes.
I am afraid I will have to unleash a mouse into the trash.
The weather, although supposed to be in the high fifties,
is grey.
I would feel more motivated if the sun was out.
The heater keeps kicking on.
I take this as a sign not to venture out yet.

In studying this morning, I had the word refocus on my heart.
So many areas of my life and the lives of others
that seem some redirection is needed.

I know for me, that I need to act immediately
when I have a thought of someone in my life.
Whether is be a card, or call or prayers for them.
If I don't act, then the probability that I will remember to act later,
is quite slim.

So, I am going to write an email to all my Shaffner family members.
Asking them to send me a current photo of them
and a portrait taken about 10-20 years ago.
I read in the Parade magazine today that people with dementia
have an easier time remembering if they can see and read the information.
I am going to make a family book for Mema.
We aren't doing gifts this year for Xmas.
We are playing dirty bingo.
No one needs anything and if they do, they usually get it themselves.
Food, games and fun.
Maybe I can find something "giving" for us all to do too!

Well, I have talked myself into getting busy!
I finished my Halloween weaving last night.
I will felt it today and post a pic.
I must also figure out my nano!
And I need to finalize the Thanksgiving menu and shopping list.
Ugh.
I am blessed!

Things I learned from my daughters

It's ok to want to have mom take care of you sometimes.
Especially when pain is involved.

Don't be afraid of colors.
One bright color will "pop" any outfit.

Don't wear black and brown together.
Especially one color shoe, another color outfit.

Naps are amazing!

Working hard only has so many rewards.
Doing what you love is priceless, no matter how many hours you put in.

Empty nest is a needed difficulty.
Time alone is precious.

Getting a surprise invitation for drinks or dinner mean more
when spaced out.

Home is a good place. Make wherever you are home.

Thanksgiving meal is best when everyone pitches in.

Texting good night makes a mom sleep better. Even at 3am.

Texting good morning,
even if that is the only communication that day,
makes the day a little brighter.

Keep your mouth shut until you are asked for your opinion.

Leave when you feel like it is time to leave.
Staying longer only brings up bad conversations.

Friends and boyfriends are important...even if I don't like them.
Again...keep your mouth shut!
And try to control facial expressions.

Margaritas are fun!

Being on your own for a bit rejuvinates you.

Being excited about a new interest opens so many windows on your
imagination, and energy and soul!

One thing I am hoping to learn is how to use my nano.
The only songs I was able to download were their songs.
Not all of their songs I enjoy!
Although I must admit that I haven't listened to all 276 of them yet.

Discovering a new relationship as adults is like making a new friend.
It's not all about what I say anymore,
but agreeing on shared interests, and acknowledging dislikes
takes time and effort.
Well worth every moment.

Our values are the same, even if we go about them differently.

My love for them has changed as my role has changed in their lives.
Each kind has value and memories.
I am enjoying now and not looking back...too often.
Looking forward to the fazes as they come.

Safe

Do you feel safe in your home?
Safe in your back yard, garage, front yard?

I was walking Chuck, just up and down my block tonight.
I was out all day, but felt he needed a treat!
He enjoys walking so much.
Almost as much as the cookie he gets upon returning from outside!

As we were walking, I was looking at my neighbors' homes.
Yards raked or not, some nicely landscaped,
others (not many) in need of some repair.
I noticed, while passing a home down the block,
two people were standing in the garage talking.
There were cars in the drive,
so I could only glance at them on either side of the car.
If truth be told, only before passing the drive.
Otherwise, I would have had to turn and look.
This narrative makes it seem as if these neighbors were doing something...
at least interesting.
No.
They just caught my eye.
And made me think.

I remember times when Terry and I would talk in the garage,
while working on a home improvement project,
or Papa and I would watch the thunderstorms coming in
from the safety of the garage.
I don't ever remember being aware of others on the street, passing by.

Working in the yard, especially the back yard,
brings a special kind of privacy that only the late spring through fall brings.
When there are no leaves, Morris Park Country Club members and staff
can view my yard and house with abandon.
Winter is really the only time I even think about anyone being behind me.

I feel this way in my car too.
In my own little world, singing as loudly and as badly as I can.

One of my favorite past times is taking a drive at dusk.
Most people do not close their blinds or curtains in the early evening.
I can see the televisions in the front rooms,
Sometimes dinner being set on the table,
People sitting in comfy chairs, and decorating styles.
All are unaware that as I drive by, they are being observed,
even for only a tiny moment in time.


Is this a common feeling?
Will I be more prone to notice others when I may be observed?
How big is my little shelter in the world?
And does anyone even care?

Hunkering in for the winter

What is it with the fall time?
I know the sun is not shining as long,
which affects our sleep patterns.
The chill in the air, especially at night,
brings out the flannel sheets and electric blankets.
Knitting and fibery things are taking over my free time.
This cold/flu/infection has me digging in and doing not much.
Even Charlie seems to be napping more these days.

I ventured out this morning to Meijer for kleenex,
oj, and powdered sugar donuts....
comfort...come on!
I strolled down the milk isle.
What is with all these new creamer flavors?
Caramel Apple (the one I got),
eggnog,
peppermint,
white chocolate mudslide,
marshmallow cream,
vanilla caramel,
dark chocolate,
hazelnut (not for me, allergies),
gingerbread, and gingerbread latte,
sugar and spice,
Belgian chocolate truffle,
cinnamon bun....
and even skinny ones..caramel macchiatto, and vanilla latte.
I also ran across soy nog and pumpkin flavored soy milk!
(Which, being menopausal, soy is out for me too).

Isn't it way too easy to hibernate with mac and cheese,
fried zucchiniand garlic with evoo and pasta,
and some hot cocoa with marshmallows,
wearing slippers and a blanket on the couch,
candles lit, a little Xmas cd in the background?
Now we have to add all these tempting flavors that
further keep us away from the treadmill,
and yearning for coziness?

I wish you luck, my friends.
As for me,
I'm still recooperating from whatever illness is being thrown at me.
On the couch, Karen's sweater in hands, a peppermint mocha for company!
I am blessed.

Ouch!

Yup! It's two in the morning....
I mean one in the morning now with the time change.
I watched Prince of Persia tonight with dinner.
Not a bad movie.
However the movie was over before eight pm,
and I was bushed.
I seem to have been on my feet all day, and it was a great day!
Coffee with Hil,
Chili with Karen,
Quick hi to V,
Bra shopping at the mall....
One of the worst things in the world!
AND, it must have been a huge sale everywhere,\
because there was not a parking spot to be had,
Everyone and their mother was shopping.
One nice thing, and I don't know the cause,
But center court smelled of pine trees.
One of my favorite smells in the world.
They were setting up Santa.....yes, already....
And the wreaths and trees were all in his little area.
However, they were fake trees.
Could have been Bed Bath and Beyond...
or is that Bath and Body Works?

Any way...off to Lane Bryant because the mall apparently thinks there
are only small chested, 100lb chickies that need bras.
Luckily, LB was having a 40% off the entire store sale.
I got two bras....even though my hair was a total rat's nest by the end
of trying them on!

Trudged out to the parking lot and to Old Navy.
Did you know they had a 50% off all outerwear sale.
I got a much needed pea coat.
Now maybe I won't have to sew on the buttons from my old coat.
It's needed repair for 3 years now.
But that coat does have a furry hood!
Maybe this weekend since, I don't have to do it anymore.
That's seems to be the projects I'm working on now.
I need to finish Karen's sweater for Christmas...
only have to knit the shoulders on the front and sew it together.
But what do I chose to work on?
A pair of detailed socks, that won't even fit me!
Some lucky small footed woman is going to get a great pair of socks!

Which brings me back to my hurting feet.
Before I sat down for the evening,
I started cleaning out my hall closets.
Why I need to do this, I don't know.
I found 4 coffee pots, 5 old computers, 1 printer, 2 screens,
a housefull of sheets and pillowcases,
at least 3 boxes of things I have to "go through",
3 angel food cake pans, 5 pie plates,
a George Forman grill...sorry V called dibs on that one,
4 good cans of paint, 3 empty cans of paint,
2 fondu pots, 3000 cookie cutters,
board games no one has played in years...etc etc.

So if you are in need of ANYTHING, please get in touch with me soon,
or Goodwill is getting a crap ton of stuff!

A bit of Tylenol and a cuppa sleepy time tea,
and I am going to try to sleep a bit.
Maybe if I put cold pack on my hurting feet, they will give me a bit of respit.
Please, someone......help my feet and pain!
This is ridiculous!

Cleaning Doors

I don't know why I do this.
I have regular chores I do every day, every week.
Sweeping the kitchen floor, vacuuming, dusting, laundry,
windows, bathrooms, cleaning mirrors, dishes....
But every once in a while I notice the not so every day chore.
One of those is cleaning off the doors around the knobs.

I use the doors every day.
I see the doors every day.
But I don't notice the condition of them often.

While on the phone with Terry today, I cleaned off the doors.
I noticed them a few days ago, but life got in the way,
and I didn't get to it until today.
All my doors are painted steel core doors.
All but one is white.
They all show dirt.
They all need to be repainted or replaced.
For now, I will have to live with them.
And hopefully put them on the cleaning rotation.

A Study of Contrasts

I am studying Beth Moore's Jesus
90 days with the one and only.

I was getting a bit frustrated with some of the days,
as I was expecting awesome, life changing lessons and
insight into my Lord!
Then I took myself out of the study and LOOKED at what the lesson was.

Mark 1:29-34
Simon's mother in law is sick and he told Jesus about her.
Jesus went to her and bent over her, took her hand,
lifted her up and healed her.

Yup, I've read this one before too.
Then I LOOKED.
Jesus didn't just think it and she was healed.
He bent over her, touched her, one on one with her.

Beth relates this moment as a mother whose child is sick.

We moms bend close, face to face, look them in their fevered eyes,
feel their hurt, feel the heat of their little bodies.
I still put my lips to my 20 something daughters when they are ill.

This brought me closer to the God who loves me.
Knowing that He bends close in times of pain, hurt, fear,
as well as joy and excitement.
He is here with me!
On a very personal level.
Not from the Heavens.
RIGHT HERE WITH ME!

The day before's lesson was on satan.
Ezekiel 28:11-17, Luke 4:31-37

The description of satan is one I am not familiar with,
but fits him perfectly.
You were the seal of perfection
full of wisdom and perfect in beauty.
Every precious stone was your covering
Sardius, topaz, diamond, beryl, onyx and jasper.
Sapphire, turquoise and emerald.
All in settings of engraved gold.
Anointed cherub who covers
until iniquity was found in you.
Therefore I cast you as a profanity.

The contrast between the humble, loving Jesus, who cares
and the Self loving, shiny, seems to have everything we want, satan
overwhelmed me.

This is giving me something to ponder today.
A friend who inspires me, also posted a challenge on facebook today.

Stand up and fight! Do something kind for someone you don't like. Forgive someone for something that you have been holding a grudge for, and let them know you forgave them. Be generous with someone that you don't trust. Extend the hand of friendship to someone that has few friends. Love someone that no one else does. You have been challenged :)

Thank you Bruce for reminding me of what Jesus would and does do!

Dancing with David up on the Mountaintop!

I didn't sleep much on Monday night.
I haven't slept much the past week or so.
My mind was occupied with worries.
Worries about my sister and her finances.
Worries about my grandmother's broken ankle.
Worries about my mother and father's upcoming move.
Worries about my mother's health.

So I was awake.
I sought out my Beth Moore Bible study.
Jesus...90 days with the one and only.
I'm only on day 14.

It was 2:32am.
My window was open beside my bed.
I could hear the wind beginning to blow the leaves outside.

I began journaling.
Just the stuff on my mind, my worries.
Joking about Terry snoring beside me. LOL

Now this is generally what my journal/Bible studies are.
Whining then any inspiration from the author or Word.

This was the next sentence I wrote:

The night is very windy -
kind of feel like angels' wings are all around me.
Warm/cool breezes through the window.

I just give all of this to You my Lord.
Help me get rest and think clearly in the new day.
Let me have patience and wisdom and peace.

I then began to study.
Matthew 3:13-15
The study question:
What keeps many believers from being humbled
and overwhelmed by the presence of God?
What keeps me?

I read the story of John baptizing Jesus.
John baptized Jesus with water, and Jesus baptized the Jordan with Grace.
For Jesus it was the end of the beginning.

I wrote how I would love to see the Jordan one day.
Beth Moores' fictional description of Jesus' baptism was breathtaking.

Use me Father - but I am so unworthy to be used by you!
These winds are stirring outside and also stirring in me!
I can feel You next to me and I feel so....
no words come...
but You are speaking to lowly me.
I am Yours to do whatever with.

3:13 am
I could not stop studying!

Father - I crave You like water and I am parched!
I do not want to stop drinking in your lessons for me!
Bring me the awe and wonder of Your unfailing presence -
Your rest and your strength.
Use me today and from each day following.
Let those see You in me, and let me diminish to nothing!
You are refreshing, and building up, and grace filled,
and encouraging when I don't deserve any of it.
All for You, only You.
Hold Your bondervant to remember this always!

Matthew 3:16-17

Beth Moore gives a thought that I never considered.
Jesus was here to live as we do.
To sympathize with us in our daily struggles and joys.
He did not see into Heaven every moment,
or hear His Father speak audibly to Him all the time.
Just as we do not.
Some of His prayer was spent talking to God, knowing only in His own spirit
and through God's Word what the Father was answering.
Just as we do.

How exciting it must have been each time the Heavens opened up to Him.
And how awesome when God spoke lovingly to Him!
Times to be cherished and burned into memory!
Someday I will see God like this too!
Oh What a Day!

I don't want to sleep!
Can I sleep and rest now?
The fullness of You is overpowering, but it is also restful.
My eyes grow heavy but my soul is singing out as it has never sung before!
Full of hope and love and rest.
Joy and the power of you.
I hunger in my heart.
One that knows every inch of me,
Focus in on me Lord like a laser.
Use me and every breath I have to proclaim Your Glory to the nations.
Not that they should hear me, but to listen to You.
My desire is to rest in You.
To sing and dance and cry for You.
The pain of those who do not know this feeling is crushing.
And all it takes is to choose to be Yours and to die to self.
If those doors that You closed in lives around me,
and the breeze through these windows of their souls be opened to accept You,
let them know this joy now!
I am anxious for them to know it NOW!
But in Your time they will see.
Even as I see this tiny glimpse for the first time.

And then I slept.

And the next few days brought all kinds of struggle.
Struggle I don't think I could have handled well at all
if I had not had this meeting with my Master!

I honestly don't know why I felt I had to blog this moment in my life.
This was the first time in 46 years that I have ever felt
so overwhelmed with the love of God for me.

I truly feel as if David was listening to me!
He and the angels were leaping and jumping and spinning for me.
I experienced a tiny moment of what David must have felt
while writing the psalms.
And if this is even slightly true,
then I know that David wanted to share this with me,
as I want everyone to have a moment like this.

God is so good!
May I be a song writer again and again.
If not, then I will be satisfied by this fraction until I meet my Lord in Heaven.
This tiny moment will carry me through!

Thelma and Louise

What a glorious day today has been.
I woke early after a good night's sleep,
Texted a friend to go with me to breakfast.
We ended up at Perkins.
And stayed for 2 1/2 hours.

Growing friendships are such a blessing!
Sharing stories and pasts,
looking forward to the future,
being inspired by the other.
Sharing kleenex when the tears flow.

Starting a new friendship is always difficult for me.
Will we have something in common to talk about?
Or will we sit silently?
I hate silence between people.
Oh, between long time friends, or family
silence is very nice.
V and I can sit for hours at B&N and not say a word to each other.
But new friends?
I always think I am boring.

Today was nice.
It inspired me to be thankful.
I raked the whole backyard,
took Mema to Krogers for face powder, cleanser and bread.
Had a bite to eat with Hil at Hacienda between clients
and am now sitting for the evening with Chuck,
knitting on baby Teagan Rose's baby hat.
The WII mittens are done, as you can see.
The daughter of my BFF in Alabama brought her into the world the 18th.
Asia will always be my girl too!
Look at all these grandbabies I am getting!

Anyway, Thelma and Louise came from my friend's sense of humor.
She did not know where I was taking her for breakfast.
I asked if she had any plans and she replied
"Just drive Thelma!"
Ya, she and I in my bubblegum held together van!

WAHOO!

Hustle and Bustle

Saturdays for me, should not be any different than any other day.
Shouldn't be.
I seem to have a mind set that Saturdays
are for doing the things that you normally don't do.

When the kids were little, I would wake early on a Saturday
and my mind would be whirling with what adventures would find us.
For some reason, we hardly ever planned the night before.
Some days we would pack a lunch and head to the beach,
or Potato Creek State park, or the dunes in Michigan City.
Some days we went to Brookfield Zoo.
One time we just started driving and wound up in the country, with a picnic.

Terry was never a good morning person,
and with my brain going ninty to nothing,
I'm sure it got quite frustrating.

Now, with Terry driving,
and the kids both out of the house and working all the time,
my mind has slowed a bit.
A BIT!
I still find weekends full of possibilities.

The weather today is wonderful.
I have a party tomorrow for stamping and tasting.
So cleaning is on my list today.
But not much.
Had breakfast coffee with V this morning.
Not thrilled with Caribou coffee, but hey...it's coffee.
Had lunch with the girly girls, which is always wonderful.
However, it does take a big chunk out of my Saturday...
which throws me off a bit.
We used to meet in the evening once a week,
which let me unwind a bit at the end of the day.

Half the day is now gone! Where did it go?

So, I made some dips for tomorrow, then my folks came over.
They are looking for a needlepoint picture and think it is in my attic.
All their lost stuff is always in my attic...
SO I trudge upstairs and go through the endless boxes
and do not find what they are looking for.
At least when they move this December, my attic will be free again!
AHHHHH
Now the day is really gone.

Guess I'll finish painting next week, Monday through Friday,
when I do not make any plans.

Spinning the Halloween batts may make it on my list today!

Direction

Do you ever wonder if the direction you are going
is the way you are supposed to be going?

Are you doing everything you can do to make it
turn out even better than you had originally planned?

Are you stepping out of your comfort zone?

If you are feeling fulfilled with your gifts and responsibilities,
and find that this is the direction you are to go,
can you adjust your pace or tools you use
to get a better result?

I am finding that I love what I do.
Everything I do!
However, when it comes to people,
I definitely need to step things up.
Take that risk.
Offer those words that I need to first recognise in order to offer.
Invite, pray over, make room, dive into that new relationship,
take notice of the unfamiliar, and listen for the cues.

There is so much here to celebrate.
What I do, I do well, but can do better.
Not everyone can do what I can do.
I can help others see the value though.

I am blessed.

Elusive Sleep

I know what the problem is.
I know what the results of no sleep to me are.
It is just too durn late for me to do anything about
any of it today.
This is the day for all the errands.
Tomorrow is Mema day,
followed by my Boundaries small group.
V and I are taking mema to the new mexican place
where Don Pablos used to be.
Hopefully before then, Mema and I can visit the little mall people.
After two weeks, she has this down and is looking forward to it.
TO be honest, I look forward to it too.
An hour or two where all I have to do
is sit with a cuppa and watch all the wee ones.

Mom and Dad decided to move to Walnut Grove.
And they will be moving Mema in with them.
I went and saw the place with them last night.
I think it will be fine for Mom and Dad.
I am worried about Mema though.
She will have her own room and bath on the first floor.
She will have two nice views into the yard from her room.
She loves having Trixie around!
And she won't spend so much time alone, and get 3 good meals a day!

HOWEVER.....
Patience is not a virtue of either of my parents when it comes to Mema.
She is going to be quite confused for possibly a long time.
She feels like she has to help when at someone else's home.
And she is used to being by herself in her own place.

You see why I'm not sleeping much!

I also need to prepare for my Boundaries class a bit more.
I had it all planned out for 8 weeks,
then began getting into chapters 2 and 3.
Need to take a step back.
For those who want to dive in...which is preferable,
we may have to go a bit slower.
This is definitely a wonderful study,
everyone needs to read for REAL life.
I am getting alot out of reviewing it after 8 years,
when I led the girly girls in it.
My life has changed and I needed a refresher.

So, focusing on getting my van running again and all that entails,
Boundaries, sprucing up the house, Charlie REALLY needs a bath,
All I really wanna do, is nap and spin!

I think a nice blending of the above sounds good.
I just pray that I stay awake in the leader's meeting tonight at LSC!
Sorry Sam. It's not you....REALLY

Back to Year 495

UGH!
5 steps forward, 3 steps back.
Knew I shoulda said less at the time.
When will I learn to not say it all....
for Satan loves to jump in when I am on the Hill.

God still has me tightly wrapped in His arms.
He is still using me.
People can be harsh and traveling with their own baggage
and hurt those they love without realizing it.
Me too.
I also have baggage.
Just thankful that God loves to use the screwed up,
stumbling, selfish, forgetful me.

I am proud to show His glory when He offers me the opportunity!
I just don't want to embarrass or hurt His name.

Bleh.

Year 500, Day 1

I'm not in the middle of the 500 years waiting on the Lord.
I'm walking into the Jordan with my water wings on.
I am standing at the top of a small hill,
looking West and smiling.
God does keep His promises.
It was good to be reminded of that today.
Oh, I still see many larger hills in the distance,
but for right now I am flying with the eagles.

I was reminded today of how many promises God has kept this week.

Ask and it shall be given.
Where two or more are together, I shall be there also.
Serving others prepares you to lead.
Victory occurs when you let God fight your battles.
Guidance from God for daily living comes from His Word.
Don't wait until you are without hope to cry out to God.
Faithfulness in the little things will prepare me for greater tasks from God.

I over did it a bit yesterday with all the ceiling painting.
I forgot how hard that is on your shoulders and neck.
Today I carded six batts of Halloween inspired wool!
However, I was standing all day whilst carding.

Greeted at Living Stones Church evening service,
and stupidly decided to wear a summer dress.
Oh, this was ok, because our Indian Summer was 85 degrees today.
No, because of the dress, I couldn't wear the big pink crocs.
I put on my sandals with orthotics that I am really unsure of.
Now my feet are swollen and hurting.
Ice and rest tonight and tomorrow.
God's little way to tell me to slow down.

I get it.
Thanks God.
Maybe I can get a big chunk of Karen's sweater done.

Loving my life and all it's ups and downs.
And right now it looks like ups for a bit.
I, however am preparing for the next round whenever it may come.
Being strong and courageous.
I can tackle anything with God.
Mainly because He is the one tackling it.
Me standing behind Him.

Jelly Season

My favorite time of year is Autumn.
My favorite month is October.
My birthday is devil's night...Oct. 30
My favorite winter evening drink is candied apple juice.
Just put some red hots in the coffee filter,
instead of water, use apple juice.

So why not add some red hots to apple jelly!?
MMMMMMM. My kitchen smelled of holiday today.
The candy apple jelly turned out crisp and red and cinnamony!

Apples....ap·ple   /ˈæpəl/
[ap-uhl]

–noun
1. the usually round, red or yellow, edible fruit of a small tree, Malus sylvestris, of the rose family.
2. the tree, cultivated in most temperate regions.
3. the fruit of any of certain other species of tree of the same genus.
4. any of these trees.
5. any of various other similar fruits, or fruitlike products or plants, as the custard apple, love apple, May apple, or oak apple.
6. anything resembling an apple in size and shape, as a ball, esp. a baseball.
7. Bowling . an ineffectively bowled ball.

The fruit of God.
Supposedly.
They are by far the most versital of produce.
Poor Michigan had a very short season for picking though.

jel·ly (jl)
n. pl. jel·lies
1. A soft, semisolid food substance with a resilient consistency, made by the setting of a liquid containing pectin or gelatin or by the addition of gelatin to a liquid, especially such a substance made of fruit juice containing pectin boiled with sugar.
2. Something, such as a petroleum ointment, having the consistency of a soft, semisolid food substance.
3. A shapeless, pulpy mass: The hero's laser zapped the monster, turning it to jelly.
4. Something, such as a body part, that has suddenly become limp or enervated: Her knees turned to jelly when she learned she won first prize.
5. A jellyfish.

So for the year, I have apple butter,
apple clove jelly and now candy apple jelly.
Not many of each, but enough.
I still have TONS of grape jelly left!
Don't know why I was stingy with that one.

The leaves are turning.
The cool nights have been great....
but electric blankets are way too much money!
Even though the trucking company sent us $50 for driver appreciation.
I appreciate you Terry.
I will appreciate breaking down and using that gift
for an electric mattress pad.
But not this week....
Supposed to be in the low 80's!