Spring is for beautiful babies

This past weekend I was invited to the one year birthday party of the most beautiful baby ever.
Yes, I went overboard on shopping.
Bought three books that I wish my girls had when they were one.
I would have enjoyed reading these to them over and over again.
I don't recall the names exactly, but:
The Yellow Box.....a sturdy flip, opposite book
The blue truck....with all kinds of sounds for things
and Barnyard dance! 
Even now I am humming it's merry little tune!

Then I went a bit crazy at the clothes store.
Who knew boy clothes in all their plaid and beach dude were so cool!

Anyway it was a great day with great people.
Mom L made wonderful circus cupcakes and Dad M was, and always is a joy.
A few months earlier, the cutest baby girl in the world,
and one who always smiles or is making duck faces, had her first year birthday.
These two are cousins.
The parents are friends of my youngest.
I have a baby shrine dedicated to the babies.
Someday, if God wills it, I will have grand "babies" of my own!
I do have two amazing step grandchildren, whom I adore beyond measure.
I just wish I was closer physically to them.
A farm close to them is in the retirement planning stage.

Until then, oooo and ahhhh at these two!
I am blessed!

 

Chuck and the grand dog will have to do for now!

Holiday Traditions of the Past

It's been a few months since I have written anything.
It seems to have been a hard winter here.
Spring has sure taken it's time coming to our neighborhood,
and it still isn't here fully yet!
With a broken foot, infected tooth, and a mysterious fever the last two days,
I have felt oh so blue.
And I have been missing my oldest alot these days.
Terry is swinging by to take me with him to Arizona and places west....
sun and 85+ degree weather should bring that old familiar
spring to my step back!
Then it will be time to work in the yard, wash windows,
wash wool and sit on the sun soaked deck, welcoming back
the orioles, baby woodpeckers, and flowers!

I was talking with a friend this morning.
She was making spinach dip and an orange pineapple cake for Easter.
I asked who she was hosting.
Oh, only me, my husband, my sister and her son, and the two sons...who are men.
Daughter lives away, and since Mom passed away last year,
no one seems to gather anymore.

Our "celebration" will be small as well.
Hubby coming into town, Hil and her boy for brunch,
as they are going to his mom's house for dinner.
That's it.
V is in Texas.
Mom broke her rib, so I will take over some eggs to her and Dad.

I have such wonderful memories of egg hunts, decorations all around,
brunch and then Easter dinner,
neighbors bringing casseroles, games being played, and lots of laughter.
These days, I am lucky if I put the holiday flag out front.
I don't have many decorations to put out anymore,
and those I do most likely are in the attic, not important enough to rummage for.

Is it that there are no little ones around to make a fuss over?
I remember seeing the surprised faces of my girls
Easter morning when they saw their baskets.
I had so enjoyed shopping for bows, stuffed lambs, fun candy, bright clothing.
They were excited about the traditional meal that only happened this time of year,
Dyeing eggs with onion skins always brought squeals!
Is that Jesus' face in that egg?
There is the Easter bunny!

Then the girls grew older and seemed to be tired Easter morning,
well every holiday morning recently.
They have begun going out with friends the night before,
because no one had to work the next day.
It was a perfect time for drinking and staying out late.
Which of course made for naps after brunch.
One year we even played beer pong after lunch!
I don't expect any different.
Kids grow up.
They have boyfriends, who have family holiday meals that must be split.
Yes, I am the one who adjusts my plans for the boy's family.
Maybe that's why it has grown not to mean much these days.

I celebrate Easter in remembrance of Christ who died to save me!

But...

I am a hostess by nature, and at this time in my life, I don't do much hosting.
There will come a time again, with grandchildren, egg hunts, family meals.
But now, I am packing for a trip to Arizona.
It will be a nice break.
I may make a coffee cake and a breakfast casserole.
Terry is excited to make Hil and the boy an Easter basket.

Waiting patiently Lord.

I will celebrate and decorate cook for just myself if I must.
I really am blessed!

2009

Wanna trade jobs?

For those of you out there that think
being a stay at home mom is a piece of cake,
let me trade jobs with you for one day.

For those of you that are stay at home moms or dads,
a standing ovation and a pay raise are due you.

Yup, I woke up today without an alarm clock.
I fixed myself breakfast and did a Bible study.
My plan was to make some manicotti for a friend and her husband,
who has been recovering.
As I was going out to feed the birds,
still in my pajamas,
my oldest called me from Texas.
When I finally deciphered what what wrong, through her sobs,
her dog had run away...
I talked her through not panicking,
calming down long enough to think like a dog,
remember that she is micro chipped,
stop thinking about everything that could go wrong,
from getting hit in the road to someone stealing her...
and ask people if they had seen a brown and white dog,
she finally found her in her apartment complex
instead of the disc golf course behind the apartment.

Meanwhile, I was trying to figure out how I could fly to Austin immediately,
praying that the dog was not stolen or dead in the road,
and wondering why had she moved so far away!

After hanging up with the oldest, I get a text from the youngest.
"If you're getting out at all today and want to bring me food...
I won't complain!"
Last night I had made fajitas for her and the new boy wonder.
I was only going to make fajitas,
but got a disapproving tone phone call from her
three hours before they were scheduled to be here..
I trudged out in the bad weather to get two cans of corn,
and some chips, made corn casserole, guacamole, cleaned the house and set the table.
Dinner was good, we had a glass of wine,
and we even played a game, the three of us.
Always a bit awkward meeting a potential boyfriend for the first time,
for all of us.
I have been the completely accepting mom who mourns the loss after a break up,
the screaming Christian mom who flips out after an overnight,
and now I am trying to be somewhere in between.
He took all the left overs home with him.

Later that night I texted the youngest only to get no response.
As a mom, in horrible snowy weather,
I worried that she got home ok.
I texted again.
I called and left a voice message.
I texted again.
I searched facebook for a friend I knew she had been hanging out with
(Boy is so new, I don't have his number)
I facebook messaged the friend
if she would let youngest know to text her worried mom.
Finally decided to go to bed, because there was nothing else I could do.
Texted her that message.
Fifteen minutes later, she texted and said she had fallen asleep and didn't hear the phone.
Ya, ok.

So I made a chicken sandwich, chips, apple, pudding and yogurt
for my starving youngest daughter...
who just last night was telling the boy that she kept frozen meals in the work freezer.

Thankfully my parents had stopped by,
so they dropped off lunch and manicotti for me!
They also let me vent and calm down.
Blessed are parents of all ages~!

Four hours after getting up,
I am about to hop in the shower, do a load of laundry,
put away the clean dishes I just washed,
and possibly ply some yarn for my spinning class.

In the middle of this, I know I will be facebooked by my husband.
(He is in Canada, and I have put the kabosh on phone calls that cost $.89 a minute)
Most likely he will need his sounding  board, companion, cheerleader and partner.

Please do not get me wrong!
I absolutely love my job!
Every part of it!
And feel so blessed that I can be home to care for loved ones.
However, I challenge anyone who thinks this is an easy life,
to trade with me for just one day!
The emotions will crush you!
You will never  be able to read a book in one or two sittings.
And you will long for your corporate, vacation days, sick days,
etc before the day is out!

P.S.
I know that God has everything under control,
and loves my family more than I ever could.
So as I calmly handle my job,
when I get a little crazy, He allows me to vent and be frustrated.
He also reminds me that He has it all under control
and loves my family more than I ever could.

Blessed!

winter

Just a few images I've captured this winter.
It never ceases to thrill me when I put fresh seed and suet out.
The birds flock in.
Blessed.

 

Just wait....

Something extraordinary happened last week!

It's been quite the month.
I have learned to sit still and heal.
Sitting still is so very difficult!
I was unable to be with the one I love the most
in her hour of greatest need.
I believe that others needed to step in.
I believe that God is always in control.
I believe He was telling me to let Him handle this,
because He loves her so very much more than I could even imagine.
He called my Grandma home.

I was able to help plan and celebrate her life!
It was a beautiful life.

The day after her memorial,
an old friend contacted me on facebook.
He wanted to let me know that he had been thinking of me
in this difficult time, and wondered if I was ok.
As we chatted and caught up on our families,
he mentioned that he wanted to return something to me
that he had kept for over thirty years.

(Ya that hurts even to write!)

I couldn't imagine what he was talking about.

He told me that he was holding something in his hand
that my grandmother had given me, and I had given him.
He felt it was time to return it.














(my initials KVT engraved on it)

I received the necklace in the mail today.
It is just as I remembered it.
And I remembered it as if it were yesterday,
when he told me what it was.
I had no words.
Thank you.

For thirty years God has been saving this charm in my friend's hand.
I had forgotten all about it.
God knew that I would need this gentle reminder
that He loves me and thinks of me every moment.

This dime sized charm began to stir in me,
that in every area of our lives,
the happiest of days,
when a child is born;
you find and marry the love of your life,
the spring sun shining brightly after winter's gloom,
or the most horrible of days,
saying good bye to a loved one;
loneliness,
illness,
during natural disasters,
that God is thinking of you.
He always has the perfect gift for you
even if it takes decades to arrive.
He has been planning this all along.

I will wear this reminder for a while.
Then I will put it into another treasure from Grandma
that was given to me last week.

In 1984 I  now remember
buying her a music jewelry box for Christmas.
She loved music boxes.
This one plays "Somebody Loves Me".
Inside was the note I had written her,
and the note she had written under my own.

"This goes to Kris Ballard after I'm gone,
a loving thoughtful granddaughter.
Grandma (Dorothy) Shaffner

Thank you God, for loving me!

True gauge is in the eye of the beholder

I found an adorable sweater pattern that I have been wanting to knit for myself.
I have been putting off knitting because I have been concentrating on spinning
and completing my master spinner #1 class.

Then I broke my foot and was scheduled for surgery the next day.
I found some icelandic yarn I had dyed this summer with madder.
I knit a 4x4 gauge and found that it was way too big...
the yarn was more bulky and the needles too large.
So I went down a size needle and chose the next pattern size down.

I happily cast on 341 stitches, onto 40" circular needles,
with a beautiful wrapped yarn I had been wanting to use.
p1, slip 1 across wrong side, K1, P1,
slip 1 to end, K1 across the right side, for an inch and a half,
then started stockinette knitting.

I took my project to the hospital with me,
and happily passed the time waiting on my surgery.
I was definitely a novelty with the nurses and aides..

I switched from the darkest to the lightest dyed yarns in wonderful stripes
throughout the sweater over the next three weeks.
Yes, I noticed some bleeding of dye on my hands as I knit,
But that didn't bother me too much until I got to the white yarn.
Not only was there a bit of bleeding onto the white, but it was a much thinner yarn.
I decided to rip out the two rows of white and double the yarn.

When I took the needle out, I wrapped the sweater around me to check size,
as it is really hard to find a true size on circular needles,
when you are knitting in one piece.

To my dismay, I discovered that my sweater was going to be 36" too wide!
Now, I was knitting the 2x size, so it wasn't going to be a small sweater to start with,
and I like roomy sweaters.
I ripped all 11" of knitting out and began again.

However this time, I rinsed the yarn until no color bled out.
This took forever, and I am not looking forward to my water bill.
It was kind of fun though, as I am writing my reports for my spinning class,
and part of the description of wool is that it is hydroscopic...
which means it holds 30% of it's weight in water before feeling wet.
This was made very clear to me as I held the skeins under a full stream of water,
and it was only trickling through the yarn into the sink.
Fun!

The skeins are still drying and I have cast on again.

 

This time, I cast on 220 stitches and am making the extra small size.
I love the yarn and hope that the size works better with the yarn.
If not, I have no objection to ripping out again
and spinning a smaller fingering yarn to begin again.

Change of direction

The holidays and New Year have brought many changes to our family.
We celebrated Christmas this year, for the first time in eight years,
without any boyfriends.
It was nice but different.
Mema was not feeling well, so we visited her on Christmas day
instead of bringing her to my house.
Terry was home for a few days and we enjoyed every moment!

December 28th, V and Hil and I began our trek to Austin TX.
V finished her Masters in English and her thesis,
and decided to move south.
She will write and begin her adult life in a wonderful city!
She is a most excellent wordsmith and I look forward to her musings.
A new dog will be involved as she has adopted a Besenji.
2 year old Roxy who is a rescue dog.
She is on the jogging team, so Roxy will be an excellent companion
as V loves to run!
Now the 35 stairs to her apartment may be a challenge at 5 in the morning
for puppy potty trips, but hopefully a two year old will be accommodating!

Hil just returned last night from an extended vacation:
Texas, a youth trip with LSC to Ohio, and a 30th birthday trip of her friend
to Las Vegas.
Oh to be twenty three/four again!
She was very lucky and plans to take me to Four Winds soon
to teach me the ropes of Black Jack!

I was very much looking forward to spinning,
exercising and continuing the etc of my life in 2013.
God had a different plan.
Lest Wednesday, as I was walking Charlie,
I slipped on some slushy snow.
Didn't fall, just a twist of the foot.
I thought nothing of it.
I finished the walk, washed dishes,vacuumed,
fed the birds, mopped the floor....you know every day stuff.
Sometime in that list, my foot began to hurt a bit.
Just a slight annoyance.
Later that night, I looked at my foot and the side of it looked a bit swollen and red.
Hil made me call the doc the next morning.

Now with my Charcot, http://www.foothealthfacts.org/footankleinfo/charcot-foot.htm
I feel no pain at all. So when I do feel pain, say a 3/4
for anyone else this pain would be a 9/10
I should have noticed and stopped my activity.
Doc was out of the office the next day so I stayed off my ever swelling foot.
Friday I went to the doc with an xray.
He walked into the room and said
"Shit."
Scheduled me for surgery the next day to put a plate on the metatarsal of my pinkie toe
that had broken in half.

So, here I sit, with foot raised, new rollabout by my side
(as crutches are hard to learn at age 48)
and spinning wheel sitting forlornly in the corner.
I have been saying that I needed to get my paperwork completed/started
for my spinner's course.
At least I have all of the sheep breeds spun,
and ninety percent of the other spinning done.
I only have to wash and spin the five sections of a sheep fleece,
and desrcibe the differences.
So now I will begin reports on the ten sheep breeds,
different ways to spin, my spinning wheel and proper posture for spinning,
wool processing equipment, difference between woolen and worsted,
and a glossary of terms.
Hopefully I will be able to spin soon enough to complete my final project:
wash, prepare, dye, spin and knit an item.
Thinking maybe a pair of fingerless gloves.
However, as I am sitting here, I am also knitting a cardigan for myself
out of hand spun and dyed icelandic.

Hil is taking very good care of me.
My mom was with me through surgery and recovery and took very good care of me.
(As my whole family was out of town when this happened)
I have the best friends and care team anyone has ever been blessed with!
We have so much wonderful food coming in!

I will be fine.
Again, I feel no pain, so Tylenol for the sore shoulders from crutches
is the only pan meds I need.
This is a blessing and a curse, because my mind thinks I can just get up and go.
My body won't tell me through pain that I must rest and heal.
I'm trying!
I'm blessed.