saying goodbyes for now

I am incredibly sad today.
No, nothing tragic has happened.
I think everything is just collapsing on me
and it is catching up.
Popping a xanex so I won't sob.

I spent the afternoon with Mema today
at the mall watching all the little kids.
There were a gazillion of them there today.
School is out and there were big kids who were very loud,
tiny little 2 month old babies,
and everything in between.
We had so much fun!
Mommies and daddies and kiddos were talking to us.
Really very sweet.

As mom has broken two ribs on top of her already
broken shoulder, there really is nothing Mema can do to help.
Daddy gets a bit irritated with her constant, same questions....
like: can I help, what do you want me to do,
so they just let her come home?

I talked to my sis today and she talked to my aunt.
This coming Wednesday, I am taking Mema to the airport
so she can fly all by herself to Florida to stay for a bit.
I am going to miss her so very much.
I am afraid she won't be coming back to South Bend.
Irrational, I know, but thoughts are thoughts.

It will be the best, because I can't take care of my mommy.,
and her mommy too.
And my mommy is needing some attention and care.

Folks around me seem to be losing or caring for folks now too.
Maybe that is rubbing off since I am praying for their losses too.
My ribs still hurt.
Because of my other family responsibilities,
I am unable to participate in the beginning of Recess at LSC.
I hope I can help the second 3/4 of the program.

Just a very sad day, I suppose.
I know that God has His plan and it is perfect.
I just wish I understood what it is.
He is good all of the time, and I know this.
So, Mema leaving for a bit is a good thing.

I'll start writing more of Mema's Memories blog
and keep her with me even on her vacation!

Blessed...yes, feel it, not really right now.