I know you are hurting.
I know that you are not where you want to be.
I know it is depressing dealing
with all of this uncertainty.
But I must interject in this format,
because you do not need, or want to hear it from me.
It is difficult being the one worrying and caring for you.
All you have to do is concentrate on getting better.
We, the caretakers, must worry about you,
stress about your care and meds, if you are sleeping,
cooking what you will possibly eat,
to find a fluffy pillow, or the correct temperature,
or the remote control,
not to mention all the other daily things
in our own lives that must be accomplished,
including taking care of your stuff for you,
since you can't right now.
Oh, don't get me wrong.
It is a blessing being able to care for you.
Please understand however,
that it is almost more taxing on the caretaker to give care,
than the ill to heal.
I believe the mental stress is more tiring.
So, if I snap, or look distressed,
it is not that I do not want to care for you.
Please do not add that stress to me.
Just let me fume, or sit in the bathroom
a moment longer than necessary.
I need to regroup so I can focus more on you.
Funny, but it seems that we are needed more often than not
when we are really tired in the first place.
I know I put alot on my plate to begin with.
Maybe this is a lesson for me to declutter some.
Strength comes when it is needed, and I am blessed.
This too shall pass.
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