Thursday, January 1, 2015

Garden birds




Watching the birds over the years, feeding in my garden,
I have learned many things.
Most recently, this lesson has been on my mind:

When the chicks don't leave the nest,
Mom and Dad, wither and die without even knowing it.

I noticed this mainly with the grackle families, but all the birds are affected.

Diligently, the parents, build nests,
gathering the best supplies they can for their home.
Once the eggs hatch and before, there is always one parent guarding the nest.
They take turns feeding and protecting their young.
Their needs go second.
When the babies learn to fly, they follow their parents closely.
I have watched them learn where the feeder is,
squawking to be fed.
Eventually, they learn how to gather their own food.
Well, most do.

As I follow their growth, I notice that some birds, continue to squawk and follow their parents.
I see the babies become larger than their parent.
I am annoyed by these birds.
I feel for the tireless parents.
They are only doing what they know to do.
They are being parents.

It is called empty nest for a reason.
The purpose of many hours is no longer there.
A parent does not know how to adjust easily when the children are gone.
Their responsibility shift away from the children back to themselves happens slowly.
But it must happen!
The chicks MUST leave the nest!
Fly and make their own lives.
making their own choices and facing their own consequences.
A parent can only protect their children so long from themselves,
even though the instinct is to continue as long as possible.
But this never helps either.

Now, not knowing birds that well, I don't know if the adult children
ever return to the nest, but I wouldn't think so.

I took empty nest hard.
For a few years.
When my adult children come home, we sometimes fall into the old routines.
And this is hard.
However, over the past year or two, I have come to love my new life.
My life of me and my husband, and my relationships with friends.
I have begun an new and wonderful relationship with God!
I have learned to keep holy silent and let my adult children fend for themselves
with themselves.
For the most part,
I'm doing better!

I am looking at others and feeling so badly for them.
I see the birds' life in so many.
The squawking of adult children throwing the parents into a death spiral.
Praying grace and tough love on all of these!
That's life.
Take this as you will.
Happy New Year!