Maggie 2

What a good dog!
She lived just over 12 years.
Made it through to 2010!
Hated my mother in law!
Helped in the garden by digging and shaking the grass clumps.
She killed moles like it was nobody's business!
Loved to take long walks.
Hated squirrels.
She loved to dance and would sing along with Happy Birthday!
We had to buy paddle ball paddles so she could play with the p..tewwie!
Tolerated Charlie and was loved by him more than any other being.
Barked at the mailman, little kids, any animals passing the front door.
Only ever bit one person...Kimberly surprised her at the front door.
Always managed to end up in the bathtub when there was a storm or fireworks.
Hated when anyone fought or yelled. She would hide under the bed.
Was a great companion.
Loved being scratched with paint sticks...
especially on the backside!
Always raised her arm when scratched.
Hated the dogs next door and never even met them!
Was terrified of sprinklers...even while riding in the car.
Shivered because she got attention when she did.
Loved carrots as snacks.
Always rode on my lap looking out the window in her "..sition".
Was the best behaved dog in the whole world.
I will miss you little girl.
Rest well on your fuzzy!
January 4, 2010

Just when you think you have it all figured out...

For the past year, I have tried my best to not interfere, give my opinion or advice, roll my eyes, or make a scene.
All this because my daughters are dating.
Things are not how I would have them.
If it were up to me, "children" would casually date a number of young men before going "steady".
They would get to know, every detail, of the young men and their own ideals, values, hopes and dreams before becoming serious.

It seems I am old fashioned.
I cannot even count how many times I have opened my mouth with a comment or tried to ask a question and then have my head bitten off before the tears and yelling began.

I realized that I should take my grandmother's advice...and not say anything...EVER!
Let them come and talk at me, ask for advice, cry on my shoulder or hug me with excitement, but NEVER NEVER offer anything without being bribed to by one of the girls!

And NEVER EVER even look in the boy's direction in case he gets the wrong idea and thinks I am a horrible person and causes problems in the relationship.

I was thrown a loop tonight.
Veronica asked me to pick up a friend from the airport. He is moving here and staying with her until his place is ready.
Hilary was off and I asked if she wanted to pick him up. "Oh no! Ronni specifically asked you to get him because this will be your chance to grill him."

What do I do now?! All this self control for what? I called Terry and my best friend and asked their advice. The plane was late, so God and I had some more time.
UGH!
From the airport to the apartment, I covered sports, cars, politics, religions, his intentions, my expectations, and that I really was a very nice lady, but could make his life miserable if Ronni is allowed to driver herself home after 11pm.

Not bad I thought.

Veronica called me when she got off of work and praised me. "That is just what I wanted you to do! I needed you to be Lorelei Gilmore and pull the boy into the kitchen and let him know that you had the whole town behind you when it comes to me."

I cannot tell you how relieved I am.

Now why couldn't I have been trusted with the other one's fella.......
I really am a nice lady!
Now, back to keeping my mouth shut~!

Weepy!

I can't explain it!
I have felt like crying...or have been crying for two days now!
This is mostly a happy crying.
An I am overblessed kind of crying!
Is that possible? To be OVER blessed?
My life feels full. My cup over flowing...and flowing and flowing!
The family is healthy, and happy and safe.
We have our struggles, but nothing that keeps us down!

A dear friend is moving tomorrow...to Texas of all places!
I am so glad that I know her!
But, I didn't know that I was so attached and that she is such a valuable part of my life!
I was given a gift to be a part of her last small group at church.
She has been in snippets of my life for about two years.
I know that I do not know her well, but she is one of those people
who you have an instant connection to!
I only had one other friend like her.
One of an ex boyfriend's best friend. He was always around, always there if you needed him, and I didn't realize how much he ment to me until I moved.
As I hugged him goodbye, I felt like Dorothy saying goodbye to the scarecrow.
I'll miss you most of all!
That's the feeling I have now.
But it is also a happy felling because I know that she and I will always be close and connected.
I will keep it that way!

My church family is amazing! I only wish you could experience the love that is shared between all of these messed up people! Honest. Unjudgmental. This is the place where Jesus would attend.
When I say "I am blessed" this is at the tippy top of the list!
I have NEVER felt more welcome and a part of anywhere in my life!

I feel that my talents and gifts are finally at their peak.
Both at church and at home.
I love sitting at my wheel, creating. Then knitting. Discovering new ways, new feels, new combinations! Just waiting on a direction God wants me to take so that I can bless others as much as I am blessed!

And finally, but right there at the top of the list! My friends.
I have never had a best friend of the likes of the one I have now.
We are nothing alike, but I can not ever imagine ever being without her!
I am blessed with great friends.
I can be me with all of them! That is hard for me. But not with them.

OK. Time for more Kleenex!

shoulds

I should be finishing the 3" on Hilary's sock.
I should be painting my granddaughter's jewelry box.
I should be tying my grandson's fireman fleece blanket.
I REALLY should be cleaning house~
I should be making cards.
I should be knitting on my BFF's sweater.
I should be finishing my sweater...first from all handspun romney!
I should be finishing Christmas cookies the girls started last night.
I should be writing a letter to my sister in law.

I am done shopping for presents.
2/3 pairs of socks are done.
All I want to do, is read, visit Mema, spin, see movies, and enjoy the snow....
Wait! There is no snow..only rain!
Guess I'll tackle some SHOULDS!
Merry Christmas!

borrowing

I love how my daughter Veronica's mind works.
Her use of language astounds me.
I must borrow her words today. Most of the time she is witty and intelligent. Today however, she was hysterical.

She dropped her car off to get the oil changed and was going to walk to my house for breakfast.
I woke at 8:30 and texted her.
It was raining and I offered to pick her up.
She took me up on this.

I crawled out of my warm bed and threw on some sweat pants,
my winter jacket and out I went,
bleary eyed in search of my oldest daughter.

I was within one turn of the garage when I called her,
thinking that I missed her in my sleepy state.
No. She was still there waiting on me.
She was shocked that I was not awake.
She informed me that she had always felt guilty for sleeping in because she had the impression that I was always up at 5am,
scrubbing the floors and teaching mice to sing.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHHAHAHA!

I love how she words things!
No. Empty nest has set in, and I stay up late knitting Christmas presents, watching old movies, and find that I allow myself to sleep in as long as the dogs let me.
Most days...9am.

Have a blessed day!

hmmmmm

I am stumped today.
After reading the few blogs I follow, with such wit and wisdom and fun,
I feel inadequate today. I am totally impressed with my daughter's use of the English language. She really makes you "feel" the agony and joy of people.

I cashed in $50.16 today all in change!

I searched endlessly for a Bible study on spiritually unequal relationships
with no luck.

I walked the dogs around the block. Maggie literally stopped at every yard and TRIED to pee. Ugh! No more long walks for her. I hope she gets better soon.
This is tiring!

I plan on spending the day trying to finish Christmas presents.
I have 3 weeks. Hopefully this will be enough time.

There is lots going on around church this week, but I feel tired.
Emotionally, physically and financially! Spiritually I am HOT!

The weather is cool today and very sunny. I am barbequing tonight for the last time this season, I think.
Chicken, baked squash....I have been trying to buy a new to me squash every week. I have not been disappointed.....baked sweet potatoe and maybe brownies.
Depends if V is coming or not.
Tonight would be a great catch up on Greys night!

Tomorrow the girls are coming over for lunch and to help me decorate the tree.
It is up and lit, but the girls have always liked putting on the balls and such!
I love it! And surprisingly enough, they get better each year!

Alright....off to knit.

Going to try DAWNTREADER's soup recipe this week!

First Thanksgiving

This is a first for many reasons.
The girls are hosting their first Thanksgiving at their apartment. I wanted to go out to eat...which would have been another first...but they, Ronni, jumped in and wanted to host this year.
It is also the first Thanksgiving that I have not hosted in many many years.
It is my first empty nest Thanksgiving, and I must admit that I did not handle that too well.
There are boys involved now, and adjustments need to be made for them and their traditions and family. Just wondering why I seem to make all the adjustments.
And granted, the girls were hosting this year, so they got to dictate.
We were to eat at 7pm so Hil and Joe coudl go to his folks for the traditional 2pm meal.
V had a friend visiting from Florida and our total is up to 9 this year.
My sister and her family seem to be estranged this year and no one really brought up the possibility of an invitation to them. Hopefully this will work itself out soon. One less stress free holiday the better...until I got irratable.
I was being selfish. I cooked the turkey this year. Smoke flooded my house for some unknown reason and when I went to check, burnt my fingers on the turkey pan. Punish ed!
Terry was able to be here, which is rare for him. God blessed us with a load right through South Bend and the money isn't bad. He even will be able to stay and help get the Christmas decorations out from the attic!

So, Terry is showered, the turkey smells wonderful, pumpkin cheese cake made, all my casserole dishes, and pots and silverware and drinking glasses are at the girls'.
Time to pick up mom...dad and mema are already there.
I'm a bit tired and have a slight headache...had a sinus infection for a couple weeks. Terry will make sure I keep my mouth shut!
I am blessed!

spinning from the lock

I had a very quiet, nice evening last night.
After a very nice lunch with a new friend, I did my dishes...I hate doing dishes!

I was trying to keep my foot up so I could try on shoes with Hilary.
My plan was to card and spin some wool for her socks.
I carded 3 rolls of electric yellow/green Romney.
When I dyed it, it came out so crisp and variegated depending on which part of the lock took up which part of the dye.
The tips were almost an orange, the center was lime green and the bottom was a cool green/silver color.
After carding, it was just a big fuzzy of electric green.
What happened to all the variation?!

I had been hearing about spinning from the lock so I thought I would give it a try.
The fleece naturally comes off of the sheep in sections, which is called a lock.
You are supposed to spin from the tip to the cut section.
Since I had washed and dyed the fleece, it was a bit matted,at least a bit much to spin from without carding.
I spent a few minutes separating a few locks then spun them to see how it would work. WOW!
The rest of the evening, until I could not hold my eyes open any longer, was spent fluffing up the locks.
I hope to get time to spin it today.

Hil is coming over today for coffee cake and then shoe shopping. Leaders' meeting at church tonight and then knitting lessons tomorrow.
I have a good life. I am blessed with a wonderful husband, great kids and fantastic friends. God is good.

Oliver

When I was a middle school girl, someone in my family received a balloon as a gift. It was a Mylar, helium balloon Most balloons are vertical, but this one was horizontal...I still don't understand how that works. This balloon was red on the top and yellow on the bottom and it had two big eyes on one end! We named it Oliver.

My dad has always liked to play with helium balloons. Not as most do : Sucking the helium to speak in a tiny high squeaky voice. No, he likes to add paperclips and other miscellaneous items so that the balloon will hover and float around the house.

Oliver was very fond of discovering new rooms around my childhood home in Pittsburgh Pa. It was a two story Tudor with a full basement.
Oliver would pop behind someone while their picture was being taken at Christmastime.
He would jump out of a closet in the den when you walked in.
He would protect you from bad dreams at night then scare the dickens out of you in the early morning.
He would hide for days then suddenly appear around a corner.
Oliver even got into the basement storage closet and made my mother scream when she went to look for winter clothes.

For some reason, this little fellow has been a part of my childhood, young adult, and present life. Every time I receive balloons, I try to add paperclips so my "Oliver" with hover around the house.

I made an Oliver this afternoon with birthday balloons my friend Kimberly got me. I was waiting for my carpet to dry from the steam cleaning I gave it.
Should have done the dishes instead, but "Oliver" made me smile.

I'm still not as good as my dad at the hover technique.
He has the mind of an engineer, and I'm sure the next time he comes over, he will fix my balloons for me.
Charlie doesn't like Oliver too much though. Oliver snuck behind the couch today and floated above Charlie while he was sleeping. I'm still giggling at his leaping off of the couch and growling at Oliver. He gives Oliver a wide berth!

Anyone else do silly things like that?

welling over

I am feeling very overjoyed and full today!
At Living Stones Church, we had 14 members baptised today...7 in each service~
I sent Hilary back for kleenex as both of us were tearful throughout!
The Spirit over takes me during anything to do with members being washed clean and welcomed into the family! Seriously, I will cry at an announcement of baptism.
The worship, message and excitement were beyond words!
I even came back to the second service to watch the other 7 being dunked and was glad I did!

My Bible study is on John 12-14 today, and every week I am finding some word or idea that I have never grasped while reading the Bible. Our leader Cynthia is such a meek woman of God. Someone to look to as a great example of Christ's love and patience and understanding!

John 12:47 summarized: it is not the purpose of the sun's shining to cast shadows, but when the sun shines, shadows are inevitable.

The marks of a disciple are John 8:3 the truth and teaching of Jesus
John 13:35 to love one another
John 15:8 to bear fruit.

John 14:12 anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing.
John 14:14 Ask for anything in my name and I will give it to you.
John 14:18 I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you
(Jesus as the Holy Spirit...ya Trinity!)

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as
the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

I am so full of His peace and fall to it daily. The world is so stressful and overwhelming if I let it be.
There truly is no other gift from Him that I need, but His peace.
All else can fall by the side, but His peace keeps me strong, calm, unafraid, happy...peaceful.
There is no other way to describe it. Constant in all of life. If you do not know it, seek it earnestly until you find it~!

Ho! Ho! Ho!

This time of year is a very difficult time of year for this "artist".
I have been making most of my Christmas presents for the better part of two decades. Many still have the first learned dishclothes. These truely are a treasure! You will always find one partially completed either by the couch, in my purse or in the car.

And now, all the new idea books are out and tempting me into indecision.
My mind whirling with the possibilities.
New patterns, new colors, new textures.

The only problem with these options is that I only have a few short weeks to start and finish anything.

After discovering that I truly enjoy making socks, and spinning yarn, these became the gifts of the year. I have a few more fibery things I want to try, but as I said earlier, time is an issue.

Thankfully my family appreciates my time and energy, and at time, partially completed projects to be given in the New Year.

I should know by now, that the time to start gifts is not October, it is February!

My only positive is that I have given up the majority of my "crafts" and have focused on three specialities. They happen to be the time consuming ones.
So, if you are part of my circle, be prepared to see me knitting furiously while in your company. This includes, dinners, meetings, and all other social engagements.
And yes! I am listening and actively taking part in our gatherings. I can focus on many things at once, so don't be distracted or discouraged. Quiz me if you want, unless I am counting~! Never interrupt me while I am counting!

New Ventures

For my birthday, my family bought me attachments for my Kromski Sonata spinning wheel.
A jumbo fly wheel with jumbo bobbins and a lazy kate. The fly wheel and bobbins allow me to make bulky, arty yarn. The lazy kate is a contraption so I can ply together balanced yarns. Plying is when you spin two or more strands together.

So...I have been experimenting. I have been watching a dvd from an art yarn spinner named Jacyee Boggs. What a talented young woman. Some day I will take one of her classes, because I am sure I am spinning this all wrong. I am having fun tho!
I have been spinning thick and thin yarn, then with lace weight thread, plying it and making cute little puffs into the yarn! I have two bobbins to play with!

I also made a felted wallet last night with the hand prepared fiber yahoo group. What a neat bunch of ladies! And the wallet turned out fantastic!
Took a thick piece of foam and lay carded batting on it, then poked it for what seemed like hours until is was a really neat piece of felt. I then felted up the sides of the pocket and cute little wallet! Need to do a buttonhole and sew on a button, but I really enjoyed this. Need some new tools if I plan on continuing!

Allergies have been awful and I think I have mold in the wall next to the garage which is causing my asthma to act up. Testing it now. Vacuumed 5 times to get rid of...everything! Lots of Arm N Hammer pet smell powder! Will steam clean this weekend and hopefully be able to put wood floors and an area rug down this spring. One box at a time I think. I also need to finish the rest of the projects in the house.
I seem to have had a worse time this year with breathing, so I have had no energy for much.

Have a wonderful fall day!

Birthday

I don't feel 45. I feel 24. I always seem to feel 24. Must think back on that time and ask why that was such a good age.

33 was hard for some reason, but hubby and great friends from Alabama surprised me with a party. I was really mean to Terry for not being around for my day when he was actually getting ready for my surprise.
I hate surprise parties. Thank goodness my daughters know this. They cannot keep secrets either!

I've only had 3 surprise parties in my life and I knew about two of them.
Faking surprise is horrible!
Last year the girls did surprise me with a wonderful gift/day tho. They faked breakfast at South Bend Chocolate and then sent me on my way to a day at the spa. First time ever being so pampered. It was wonderful! Lonely, but so nice!

I have always hated being alone. When I was in high school in psych class, we were challenged to do something that is hard for us.
I spent the day alone. I went downtown Pittsburgh and had lunch alone, saw a movie alone and then had dinner in a restaurant alone. Most uncomfortable day of my life, but learned I could do it!
Now I love my time. Good thing as kids moved out and hubby is a trucker. I have learned many things to occupy myself over the years and am thankful to my mom for the love of fibery things. And the puppies keep me company!

Over all, I am expecting today to be a good day. Breakfast at my folks, hair appointment with Hil and who knows what they have planned for later. Dinner at Japanese steak house tomorrow night with all my loved ones.
And in between, I'll fold my laundry!

GOLD!

Sitting here at the computer, it is hard to settle down and come up with constructive, interesting thoughts. I am so distracted by all the gold leaves outside. Gold, and copper and muted greens and yellows.

God really outdid himself on Fall leaves. It is my favorite time of year! I enjoy the chill in the air and the early evenings, candles and fireplaces.
My garden has died down but this year I am not going to pull up all the left over branches and stems. I want to see what the snow covering will turn them into.

The coziness of these nights will help me to spin and knit up all the gifts I have for Christmas ideas. Namely socks this year as I have found a new passion. So quick and so little yarn needed! Terry's socks are don and am working on a lace pattern for Veronica.

Need to spin the grape juice dyed wool, and I have a sneaky suspicion that I am getting a new maidenboard and large flywheel for my spinning wheel so I can spin extra bulky!

Better stock up on fiber for the colder than normal winter we are supposed to have.
I really want to try both art yarn and very smooth yarns as well as finger weight.
The vet has Icelandic sheep and will sell me both fleece and roving. As soon as I pay them off for Maggie's surgery, I will have to check it out!

I have tons of dye that I want to experiment with from my cyberfriend Dori Ann. Just need to get enough fiber built up that I can play.

Off to late church today as the Pet Refuge Halloween party was too much fun. I love
the girly girls! And I so love dressing in costume! It really is the only time you can go completely insane and everyone looks at you and you truly don't mind!
Maybe that's why God gave me a birthday the day before Halloween!
I am also so thankful that my girls have such a love of costumes as well!
Hilary is so creative and crazy! Veronica has always wanted to be the princess!
One year I made a very elaborate costume for her fantasy and she came down with strep throat. Poor baby wore her costume while handing out candy!
Fall.....great memories and great times ahead!
I am so blessed!~

the deer.

I homeschooled Veronica and Hilary for about 10 years.
Veronica started in 2nd grade and Hilary in Kindergarten.
Public schools in Reform Alabama, in the early 90's left something to be desired.
I had a wonderful support group of 5 families.
We all started out using the KONOS curriculum, which is a unit study program, that is biblical based. We used Saxson Math.

One of the first units we studied, was Indians. We visited the Moundville Indians and learned so much about them. The girls researched an Indian tribe and did a report on them, complete with costume and props...I even stayed up late on night and made moccasins out of deer hide my uncle sent from Nevada!
We had a traditional Indian feast and made a totem pole with brown grocery bags...what fun.

One evening, a woman from our church knocked on our door and told us that she had just hit a deer in the road. After making sure she was OK, and getting her on the road again, Terry dragged the deer into the yard. Being a very hands on teacher, I asked if he could skin it. What a man!
I kept the girls inside for the most part, but they wanted to watch some. After midnight, I had a few steaks, eyeballs in a glass in the refrigerator, as we had a sight lesson coming up... I saved the brains in Tupperware, because that is how the Indians tanned the hide, and Terry very skillfully saved the hide in mostly one large piece. This was put into a large bucket with water and ashes from the fire ring. Again, this is how the Indians got all the fur off of the hide.

Well, the next morning we left for Gatlinburg Tennessee for a long weekend vacation...that is another story in itself!

When we returned home, we checked on the hide, and sure enough, all the hair was off....ugh. Flies and smell had taken the hairs' place...I rinsed and rinsed and rinsed.

That week I gathered the girls to tan the hide with me. Using the brains, they rubbed it all over the hide. Veronica was grossed out and used plastic bags on her hands. Secretly, I think Hilary was enjoying it, but she eventually put baggies on her hands as well.

I made a tripod frame to go over the fire pit. I, somehow, tied the hide onto the frame and put it over a smoking fire....smoking tans the hide. Hours went by with careful watching. I went down the hill to check the mail and as I was on my way back I saw flames...yes, the hide had caught fire.
I saved what I could. The girls stretched what was left, over both sides of large coffee cans and sewed them onto it. After a week, they each had a drum, that we shared with the group. Yes, they did have a funky smell.

We did examine the eyeballs but after grossing out everyone who wanted some sweet tea from the fridge, we moved that lesson up before it was actually time to study it.

What a way to start off our first year of homeschooling! A lesson none of us will ever forget!

Grapes

Veronica brought me two bushels of concord grapes from a fellow waiter who's family supplies for Welches. My whole house smells of concord grapes! It is the most delicious smell ever. Not as strong as juice, but stronger than jelly!

I truly have my work cut out for me! Especially since I go to Kokomo to spin at the Fall Alpaca Festival all day Saturday! I still need to get my alpaca carded into rollogs so I can spin them. Clean and pack the spinning wheel. And I would like to vacuum so my allergies settle down a bit!

I used to make apple jelly every year. This started when we lived in New York 18 years ago. What wonderful apples!

Last year I discovered concord grapes where we have picked apples since living in Indiana, and they smelled so wonderful, I bought some to try. I sooo like making grape jelly better than apple! It seems a bit easier to get it to jell than with apples.

Oh I am sure I will make at least a batch of apple jelly, as I want to make some crock pot apple butter! The house is going to get quite a scent treat this fall, let me tell you!

OK..Off to pop skins for pies and boil down grapes for juice. Begin the process next week!

favorite grape jelly recipe:
6 pounds concord grapes...2/3 fully ripe, 1/3 firm yet ripe
3/4 c water
3 3/4 c sugar
Wash and de-stem grapes. Crush grapes in 6-8 qt kettle. Add water. Bring to boil over high heat, reduce, cover and simmer 10 minutes or until grapes are very soft.

Strain through colander lined with cheesecloth at least 4 1/2 hours. Chill juice 12-14 hours and restrain through cheesecloth.

Place juice in kettle. Add sugar, stir to dissolve. Bring to full boil, uncovered until syrup sheets off of metal spoon or reaches 200 on candy thermometer. (20 minutes)
Immediately ladle into hot jelly jars. Process for 5 minutes

Grape Pie:
4 c concord grapes
1 c sugar
1/8 t salt
2 1/2 T tapioca
1T lemon juice
1T unsalted butter

Slip skins off of grapes and reserve. Put pulp in saucepan and simmer over med low hear until soft enough to release the seeds. (8 min) Push through a wire mesh strainer to remove seeds. Combine pulp with reserved skins.
Mix sugar salt and tapioca together in a bowl. Add to grapes and add lemon juice. Pour filling into prepared unbaked crust and dot with butter. Cover with top crust and leave air holes.
Bake 10 min at 450. Lower temp to 350 and bake another 25 -30 minutes, until golden brown. Cool for 30 minutes before serving

Hookers

I just spent the whole day in the presence of women I have know for over 15 years. They proudly call themselves, as do their husbands, hooker, dyers, strippers. The youngest woman in the group is me...45. The next youngest is my mother. She will be 70. The oldest is 102, and one died last year at 103.

I am of course referring to primitive rug hookers.
This is different from latch hooked rugs.

The base fabric is most often burlap. The wool used, and they are very particular it be as close to 100% as possible, comes mainly from Goodwill. Old skirts, men's jackets and suits are taken apart and stripped to use as the loops of the rug.
I have 8 tubs of wool in my attic that my husband refuses to move another time. I have not moved for eight years!

In colonial times, women would use old feed sacks and items of clothing that were too used to be worn to make heavy carpets for the wood floors and to add weight and warmth for winter beds. Today they are seen in magazines as table runners or floor mats.

These ladies meet the first Wednesday of every month and have met for decades before I knew them. They support each other, lift each other up, laugh alot, go to rug camps together and care for each other. I have learned so much from them! They are so kind to beginner me.

I remember the first time I joined the group. My girls were young and the ladies adored them. We met for the Christmas meeting at Mrs. Audrey Williams home. She was a school teacher in the day and Hilary took to her right away! Miss Audrey always wore purple. She even dyed her stockings purple to match everything. Her carpet was purple. She had a lovely collection of doll houses that the girls loved to play with...ever so carefully. Miss Audrey had a Christmas cactus the size and blooms I have never seen before or since.

Miss Audrey always held the December meeting. She always made concord grape pie for dessert and had hot raspberry tea to drink. The next Christmas, Hilary made Miss Audry a paper angel and she kept it when she moved to Missouri and still had it when she passed away at age 103, I'm sure. She even wrote to Hilary after she moved.

We had meetings in the Queen Ann's Inn downtown South Bend where we had tea sandwiches. We have meeting at the Center Library, and we have meetings in members' homes. Everyone brings what current projects they are hooking...some have been working on the same project for years!

The first half of every meeting I always wander around and oogle at their beautiful work. Some design their own, some buy patterns. Some of the ladies enter contests in the rug hooking magazine.

The ladies are getting older and have more than their fair share of health problems, but they show up every month eager to meet and chat and hook.

This month was my turn to host. I made orange pound cake, zucchini casserole...of course! And brought Hilary's German chocolate cake....thanks for sharing, Joe. I also supplied coffee and tea and apple cider. Everyone brings their own sandwich or other lunch item. Usually most make egg salad!

I was thinking after the meeting how sad it will be for me when the years pass. I either must find new rug hookers, or cherish this time with these wonderful ladies..because as it goes, I should outlive them all. I pray that my girls take up this craft someday. It truly is a lost art, that I am so thankful I was let into the circle of.

I enjoy rug hooking artists such as Deanne Fitzpatrick from Nova Scotia. It is my dream to go there and take some classes from her. It is also a dream to attend Cedar Hills rug camp in West Virginia with these ladies.

pecans and fall

I seem to be more nostalgic these days. I am enjoying the pink and orange sunrises through my dining room window, enjoying the orange changing leaves in the back yard, and the cool morning walks with Veronica.

I have finished spinning the marigold mohair/wool yarn and am looking forward to discovering what it want to be. I have started knitting my sweater with the silver romney and confetti colors spun throughout! I'm excited about that! On October 10, I travel to Kokomo to the Fall Alpaca Festival where I will spin alpaca! Looking forward to seeing friends again!

Preparing to go apple and concord grape picking soon and looking forward to jelly/jam making! This has been a tradition ever since we lived in NY. I remember the first time we came home with enough apples to fill our very large kitchen.
Veronica was 3 and Hilary was 1. The girls took turns cranking the apple peeler corer slicer! What fun those long strings of apple peel!

That was all I did that fall...every day! I learned how to make apple jelly the right and the wrong ways! Applesauce, apple pie filling canned, apple cakes, apple pie....anything and everything apple! Now I have discovered grapes! MMMMMMMMMMM

I have always enjoyed making jellies. When I first moved to Alabama, my mother in law taught me to make crab apple jelly, muskidine jelly, pear preserves to die for, and of course the biscuits that go with them. That is one of the southern things I can make...biscuits!

Now, I tried to make a pecan pie one of the first Thanksgivings with the Ballards.
We had 11 pecan trees on our property! Every one was picked cracked and prepared by me...one who has been allergic all her life to nuts!

I must admit, I have never made a pie that looked better than this pie.
All cut into it and took a bite. Oh! The faces they made! Not good faces either.
As one who does not eat nuts, I didn't know that there was such a thing called bitters in the pecan that needed to be removed before baking or eating!
Maybe that is the reason I am such an outcast in that family!

Dreams and Time

It's the dream you had at ten years old
and still dream
that you need to pay attention to!

I finally have time to spin all day long if I choose!
I have time to experiment with dyes and mordants and fibers!
I have time to spend with God in the mornings in the garden!
I have time to spend with friends!
I have time to volunteer my talents and energies!

It just took time.
Sometimes a seemingly never ending amount of time!

It took struggling through the every day doldrums.
It took financial crisis and boredom.
Walking the floors at night with the crying babies.
I kept my hand in my dream,
even just looking through a magazine from time to time.
I learned to look to God to get me through the tough times....and the good times! Occasionally those are the hardest to get through!

I learned that when I am at my end,
exhausted, used up, can't go one step further,
that is when God is going to use me.
I expect it now.
I am at my best when everything in crumpled on the floor!

It is His time and He lets me have joy and peace
and every blessing I have ever desired.
More than I could have ever imagined!
Thank You God!

afraid

Wonderful sermon this morning at Living Stones! About not being afraid, because Jesus is in the boat with you and has control of even the wind and waves!
Next week is worrying! So many I want to hear this message!!!

I am afraid of many things...mainly those that I have no control over. People's reactions of thoughts of me. I have been through some pretty tough things in the past and have always come through shining with Jesus' hand upon my shoulder, slightly in front of me. I know that He shields me from things I am not able to deal with and He guides me through those I can...even if I don't think I can!

Some things however, I know that I have a wall around. He can get through the wall, but I don't let Him often.

Most tension between Terry and I have to do with his family. They hate me and always have. I know, I know! How can anyone hate Kris!!!? But they do. It has ripped me apart for more than 24 years. As much as I try, and as many different things I try to get them to love or even like me, they do not. I have cut myself out of their every day lives, phone calls, letters, etc. I do pray for them and wish them well. I think I may have a start of a relationship with my S-I-L, but two steps forward, three steps back it seems.
This quietness has been going on for at least 5 years. My life has no in law turmoil in it. It makes me sad though, when Terry feels like he cannot be honest about traveling through their town and visiting. I want him to do this! I just don't want it to seem like a secret club meeting!

Ugh! Ramble ramble! Sorry.

I guess I said all of that because I struggle with another relationship that seems to be going the same way. We have our differences, but have a superficial surface relationship. I hate it! I am such a people person! I am trying, but am afraid to reach out, again, and get shot down!
Why is family so hard to overcome? So much history? But as Christ followers, should we not love in spite of history?
I'll continue to struggle and break down that wall....bricks don't do well in boats!
Leap of faith......soon!

God's plan all along

It is amazing, looking back upon my daughters' lives. Realizing that they are, and always have been the people God had in mind. From the beginnings of their little personalities, until now into their young adulthood.
If you know my girls, you should be able to see this as I describe a day in their young lives.

When we lived on 5 acres in rural Alabama, we would visit my folks in South Bend about every three months. One early spring visit, Terry and I bought the girls, Veronica 7 and Hilary 5, a Barbie Jeep. Red. We loaded it into the back hatch of the Ford Bronco and drove 14 hours back home.

The girls could hardly wait to drive around the "farm". After it was charged for the correct amount of time, we let the girls take a test drive. What fun! Both girls took turns, and when it would inevitably get stuck, one of the girls would jump out and push and pull while the other skillfully maneuvered the jeep to freedom!

Our house was in the center of our property, on a slight hill. Behind the house were 5 chicken houses and the neighbors' 100 acres. The front of the house was highway 17, then a pasture for the same neighbor's cows. Fields were at the sides. The girls were allowed to play outside checking in with me, and knew their boundaries.

I would drag the jeep off of the side porch for them and away they would go.
I so remember and enjoyed listening for them as they drove around the house in a big circle. I would peek out of the kitchen window, or watch from the front porch as they made their way.

Most of the time Veronica was the driver. Full of concentration. Making turns at the correct time, going the correct speed. (This definitely has changed!) And sweet Hilary was riding in the passenger seat, chatting constantly about only she knew what! Veronica was not even listening to her has she may make a wrong turn, and Hilary was always talking! If the jeep got stuck, Hilary would dutifully jump out, still chatting, and then have to run to catch up and jump in as Veronica drove off!

Looking back at pictures or home movies these characteristics become even more clear. Veronica reciting the ABC's at 4 and Hilary sitting next to her mouthing her version, and so proudly smiling at her sissy and clapping when she had finished.

Veronica correcting Hil, when she forgot g, h, i, and Hilary smiling and laughing at her mistake! Veronica, always the leader, the accomplished one, the one with the right answer. Hilary always happy and bubbly and ready to agree to almost anything!

Veronica, I see, as seeing things as glass half empty, and by George! She is going to make it full. Hilary's glass is overflowing, and damn the consequences, as long as she is surrounded by friends and has fun!

They both are on their own now, and have one or two jobs, working very hard to make sure they are current on bills, etc. They have goals and dreams for the future. I enjoy them as young adults. I love that they love to spend time with me, however limited their time is. I still see the little girls circling the house, though. I have tears in my eyes as I write this. What a blessing God has given me and the rest of the world in these beautiful young women. The true blessing is that they both love Him, and the world will definitely see Him through them.

Living in Love

What a fantasically wonderful appropriate sermon today at Living Stones!
I am always amazed how most if not all, sermons are directed to me personally!
I know that I am only human, and most humans have all the same trials and triumphs along the way, in different ways, but God just works and hits me every week!
We have been studying vices and how to live with those around you who have different vices than you. Today was the actual, Paul says in Romans, how you do this!
Pick up a bible and read Romans 14-15. Or go to sambarrington.com, on the right side look for pod casts of today's service (up in a few days)
Living Stones Church has a God inspired pastor and congregation.
Learned a bit of history of the Roman church and why there is such a stumbling block about what to eat and what not to eat.

Accept others and don't pass judgement on disputable matters!
Don't look down on another followers actions just because it is different than you would do, for God has accepted him!
If your motivation honors God, it is ok by Him, just as another is fully convinced that his action honors God, is also accepted by the Lord!

Do not do something that will offend a brother and make him stumble, even if it is something that you will not stumble upon. There are times to make your actions known and times when it would not kill you to not act a certain way.

If there is a discussion that you know will offend, answer that you would like to keep that between you and God.

Live free in Jesus Christ because He set us free! But act in love to your sister as well as those who are not free.

history

What we think is possible is connected to what our history tells us is true.
Sometimes we need to rewrite history!

This makes me think of all the histories I have had.
It is difficult to overcome hard times when you seem to be drowning in it.
When you are sick, it seems as if you cannot remember what healthy felt like.
The same goes for when things are wonderful. You forget the times when you needed courage just to make it through the day.

One thing I have found is that friends and sharing your life are so important to your future.
I have the best friends anyone could ask for.
I didn't meet them until I was in my 30's.
For so long I thought I would not have a single good friend,
now I have 8 that I know would do anything for me!

There are times when I have no idea why we are all still friends, or friends at all, our lives are so different.
The one reason I can see, is that we all treat each other with respect and love.
We have never had any arguments in our lil' circle.
We don't judge each other for anything, and at the same time, we give our honest opinion when asked.
These are my sisters! The ones God provided for me! The ones who make my life better...my history fine! They are worth every past event without friends.

Why is it that we can be so "friendly" with those we choose, but it is so difficult with those we are related to?
We, I, should try to be more a friend to the past too.
Life is a never ending lesson and I relish each moment!

You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you.

asthma sucks!

Not able to do much today, as when I try to walk across the room, I feel like a goldfish out of water!
Insurance won't pay for anything I need for preventative use,so I sit and breathe through the nebulizer, and remain calm!
At least I can ground myself to the house for the most part.
I can spin and card to my hearts content.

Mom , Aunt Donna and I travelled to Nashville Michigan to collect the 10 pounds of llama fiber I had cleaned and made into roving
(which is a long string of fiber all ready to spin).
I wound it all into manageable balls last night, ready and waiting for me after
I finish the marigold mohair!

Hummingbirds are now attacking my window where I sit at the computer.
I put a full feeder on the window and now, I cannot forget my humming little friends!
Be careful what you wish for, for you shall surely get it!

Do not judge yourself through another's eyes. Proverbs 31:25

Wishing you a blessed day!

Terms I use

Mordant: A mordant is a substance used to set dyes on fabrics by forming an insoluble compound with the dye.

I have only used alum and cream of tarter as a mordant, but I think I would like to dump a handful of iron nails into a jar of water for a spell, and mordant with iron! Different salts, metals and acids are used to mordant wool, cotton, silk etc.

I have used acid dyes with no mordants for years. They come in a powdered form and you just add water, boil and rinse. They turn out predictable and beautiful most of the time.

I have always wanted to try natural dyes and have begun to experiment! There is a lot I have to learn but I am really enjoying the process!

The marigolds I boiled and dyed white mohair with, turned out absolutely beautiful! I carded a mix of the mohair with a bit of romney that was dyed with marigolds, and it spun like butter on my Kromski Sonata spinning wheel. I am planning on plying it with cream colored soybean fiber!
The color reminds me of my aunt's hair! She is so proud that the color only cost her $2.99!

Carding: Is the process of brushing the fiber between two "dog brush" like paddles. This straightens the fiber and adds air to it to make spinning easier.

Plying: Is the twisting of two or more already spun fibers together to make a stronger yarn. You can use single, double, triple or more ply in any yarn.
When plying you must ply the opposite direction that the singles are spun to make a balanced yarn that doesn't twist into knots. The direction of twist is called either z or s twist depending on clockwise or counter clockwise spinning!

hummingbirds

I was reminded yesterday about an event that happened last year. As I was filling the hummingbird feeders, a tiny emerald green hummingbird landed on my finger. He sat there about 90 seconds while I held my breath statue like. Then he flew off to the butterfly bush in the yard!

WHY and HOW could I EVER forget that happening?
What does it say about me?
Have I gotten too busy with mundane ugly everyday life that I would forget that special moment God allowed in my life?

Why is it that when you live near the ocean, after a while, you forget the sound of the waves and just don't hear them any more?
Living everyday able to see the sunrise and sunset and you don't take the time to do so?
In the fall, the first leaves are so amazing, but they all still change until there are no leaves to fall any longer. The colors get "normal"!
The first snowflakes are little miracles, but after two weeks, we only see slushy hinderances!

The secret to gratefulness is to change your perspective. Sometimes this may require standing on your head!

Be grateful today about everything!

sounds fun to me

I spent yesterday afternoon trimming little goat feet, applying pour-on and
worming. Oh, fun!

I belong to a group online called handpreparedfibers and the above was a post from a girl talking about her angora goats, the fiber seems to felt on the goats but not once cut. I feel so connected to this group, even though I have never met them. Someday I will! Someday I will have my own little goats and will be trimming their little goat feet too! Life is too short~

Today I noticed many things that make me smile and ponder.
On my way to church, at stop light I noticed two little boys on one bicycle.
My first thought was, why are these young boys unaccompanied by an adult?
As I watched them navigate the street and side walk, I had to smile.
The one in back was purely enjoying the ride, if you could call it a ride, as he was not helping the other at all! The boy in front had to pedal, balance and walk the bike skillfully! He would get a running start, and then pedal like crazy about 8 times. For some reason he thought that this would allow him to coast and rest a bit....No such luck. After coming to a slow crawl, he had to begin again!
The light turned and I continued to church nostalgic of young children playing as if it were their job.

This feeling continued later in the day at the mall. I saw you young couple pushing a stroller with a very cute baby girl in it. It would not have mattered if this child was not the gerber baby, or a baby contest winner. She had the biggest, most vibrant yellow bow right in the middle of her forehead! All passing her, myself included, could not help but smile. I am sure that everyone who saw her will remember her and smile again and again.

Young parents, do not be quick to take a bow off of your child when it is small.
It is worth a little embarrassment on your part for the joy of others. Your baby will never know it looked silly!

One last sight that made my heart sink a little. In the children's play area at the mall, I passed a little girl, maybe 3 years old. She was climbing on the cow that jumped over the moon. She asked her father, "Daddy, you wanna ride on the cow with me?" Sadly he shook his head and continued to read the newspaper.

Come on! Your kids are only young once and if you do not play with them now, no matter what other people may think of you at the time, you will miss this opportunity forever! Play while you can! Dance in the middle of the kitchen with your wife, play duck duck goose with your son! Go to a baseball game with your husband and really try to get into it!

"Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you did not do than by the things you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail aqay from the safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore! Dream! Discover!"...Mark Twain

Bumpits!

What an interesting word and if not for my Hilary, I would never know of it. Now, I have a really hard time remembering weird names, and want to call it Badoinks. Maybe writing it will make me remember! For those of you not in the know...Bumpits are kind of like barettes you pit in yout hair to make it look like you have teased it at the crown....like inb the 50's. Apparently this looks terrible and doesn't work at all coming from a stylist! Makes me want to try one, just to see!!!!

Had a wonderful time and an awful date night with Hilary tonight. Horrible movie...do not waste your time with Final Destination. Rent the first one if you must see gore! Hilary and I have been scary movie buddies since she was little...that was until we saw Blair Witch....now we just see gore!

Horrible bland dinner and sent it back. Food is normally very good there!
Hil tried to make my blog poppin, but was very frustrated with the "easy"
directions. This is what I have until she figures it out!

Now as I am ready to hit the hay, Morris Park or Notre Dame has a live concert going on. Yup...I have heard country, rock, Regae...but lots of drums...and fireworks! Good thing I have my windows open to get the cool air! I'll think of thunder.

And the world keeps spinning on it's greased axis.....
I think this is from Cannery Row! Great movie and book!

yard work...play...

Just finished 3 hours of working in the back yard. Mowing grass that was way too long, but unavoidable because of family obligations and tons of rain!
I enjoy mowing. I have developed a back yard that is not symmetrical and rectangular, but one with lots of curves and road blocks filled with flowers, bushes and bird feeders! It is a very unruly garden but so cozy. You can wander through it and no matter where you go, there is always a different view and perspective to look at! Hidden roses, behind a large moon flower, a sweet bench surrounded by flowering vines and fuzzy lamb's ear.

I must say that it is a joy to be in all year long sans mosquitoes! I have a deck, fire pit, and covered gazebo! The family room looks out on the garden and I enjoy all kinds of birds, when I remember to buy feed. It really is comforting!
I do my Bible reading/study there in the mornings on the covered picnic table.
I have coffee and breakfast most times. The girls love to spend quiet mornings here!

Lots of work in the spring and fall, but it is what I enjoy the most. My mind empties and I putter around. Sometimes I talk to God and sometimes He talks to me. I feel closest to Him here.
In the fall, I hear the Notre Dame Band practicing and I can hear the cheers during games!
If you ever need to rest and be alone...you are welcome here! The gate is open but watch your step if I haven't been out to pick up the doggie messes! And yes, they have a door for free movement in the yard! But after 10 minues, they won't bother you at all!!
This past summer I spent most of my mornings sitting on the deck with WFRN radio playing and picking through 27 pounds of wool for hay and bits of vegetable matter. The lanolin made my hand so soft! What fun!

After mowing, and weed whacking (I ran out of string so am waiting for papa to fill it again) I picked one zucchini and an onion for a casserole tonight.
I also picked all the blooming marigolds and threw them into a pot to boil....yes, that's where the name came from. I am mordanting white mohair and tomorrow I will dye it with the marigold bath! I love the yellow orange this turns and as I have romney wool the same color, I will mix the two for fuzzy, shiny yarn!

On a side note...As I was mowing I remembered living in the country in Alabama. When you saw people mowing their large lawns, the husband was always on the riding mower and the wife was always pushing the lawn mower...up hills, in weeds, anywhere the riding mower couldn't go. Not just one family either, I saw this from every home! And still do. Take notice next time you ride in the country or large neighborhoods at who is mowing with what. Just doesn't seem fair!

Have a peaceful weekend!

fear of starting

I don't know why I am so afraid to begin this first blog entry.
Maybe there are too many things in my head and I don't know which to start with. I may as well jump in!

I am a Christ follower who TRIES to love on people as Jesus would, and am a very imperfect person who is stumbling and recovering every day!

I wanted to write a blog for the purpose of sharing the crazy life I live.
From acquiring, washing, dyeing and spinning 26 pounds of Romney sheep wool, to stories of raising two girls in rural Alabama and all the lessons learned there.

I have found that I don't really see things the way many people see them.

I am in the process of spinning some alum/cream of tartar mordanted (so the natural dye will stick to the wool) Romney fleece dyed with mulberries picked from a friend's yard, mixed with white mohair! A pretty pale grape color and very soft. The color has almost disappeared from my fingertips!

I am teaching my mom and her sister how to knit toe up socks. What a hoot!

One of my favorite memories is when the girls were very small in Alabama.
My husband's son was visiting from Texas. We were driving to Wednesday evening church when the car ran out of gas. My husband began walking back to the house, as we were in the middle of nowhere on a country road.
I took the guitar from the trunk and began to teach my stepson a few chords.
Folks were driving by, stopping to ask if we needed help, and we waved them on with a smile!
About 30 minutes later my husband came riding up the road toward us on a child's bicycle he borrowed from a neighbor, who lived a mile or so from us.
He had two gas cans dangling from each handlebar! He filled the tank, and off we went, singing I'll Fly Away, the song I was teaching the kids!

Have a peaceful day!